Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some people believes that advertising junk food leads to the obesity a big problem and should be banned while other people thinks that advertising junk food does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

In many big societies, junk food is very common and easily available and people prefer eating junk food to save time.Eating alot of junk food can cause obesity and people blame the advertising of junk food just to avoid eating.However, some people believe that advertising junk food does not cause obesity due to the fact that obesity is caused by the unhealthy food not by the advertising food.According to the World Health Oraginzation 80% of the obesity is caused by the unhygenic and unhealthy food eaten outside.

I believe that banning something is not the soultion of problem and advertising junk food cannot be the reason of obesity. Obesity is also cause by the hormonal imbalance , not enough good sleep and much more.So, I think that junk food advertising should not be banned.For Example: Government should introduce awarness programs so people must know the exact reason behind this.

In conclusion, people should be aware of what they are eating and what are their effects instead of blaming the advertising.People does not have control on their will when they see an ad of junk food they want to eat it so they blame advertising of junk food to the obesity problem.But problem is not the advertising problem is the unhygenic and food that is not good for health are the real causes of obesity.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You present a clear opinion that advertising should not be banned, and you give relevant reasons, including hormonal imbalance and lack of sleep. You also refer to the opposing view that advertising may encourage people to eat junk food. However, the discussion of both views is uneven: the argument that advertising contributes to obesity is mentioned briefly, then the essay mainly rejects it. The claim about the World Health Organization is not clearly connected to advertising and is presented without explanation, so it does not strongly support your reasoning. To develop the response further, explain how advertising might influence choices, then weigh this against other causes and support your position with a specific, relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the reader can identify your overall position. However, progression between ideas is not always clear. The second paragraph moves from food availability to personal choices and then to an unsupported statistic, while the next paragraph introduces other causes without a clear link to the previous point. Connectors such as “However,” “So,” and “In conclusion” help signal direction, but some links are mechanical or do not clarify the relationship between claims. The conclusion also repeats the point that advertising is not the real cause rather than synthesising the discussion. Organise each paragraph around one main claim and use clearer references to show how each example supports it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “obesity,” “advertising,” “hormonal imbalance,” and “unhealthy food,” so the main subject is clear. However, the range is limited and several expressions are repeated, particularly “junk food,” “advertising,” and “problem.” Some word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “the soultion of problem,” “advertising food,” and “the unhygenic and food that is not good for health.” There are also spelling errors, including “Oraginzation,” “alot,” and “awarness,” which reduce precision. Build a wider set of accurate phrases for causes, influence and prevention, and check spelling and collocations so your ideas are expressed more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, for example, “Obesity is also cause by the hormonal imbalance, not enough good sleep and much more.” However, errors are frequent and sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent (“Some people believes,” “other people thinks,” and “People does not”), and verb forms are often incorrect (“Obesity is also cause”). Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention: “the obesity a big problem” is unclear, and “time.Eating” lacks a space after the full stop. Several long sentences join multiple claims without reliable punctuation. Practise agreement, verb forms and article use, and divide complex ideas into shorter, correctly punctuated sentences before attempting longer structures.

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