Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

There are two different opinions about obesity and it is regarded as a major issue. Some people believe junk food marketing is largely to blame and must be banned, while others think that advertising does not contribute to the problem. In my opinion, advertising cannot change a person's lifestyle. It all lies in one person's commitment and strong will.

Those who support to ban junk food argue that junk food is full of preservatives and slowdown the metabolism that results in making them obese. In addition, junk food disrupt the harmones and aids in weight gain. Moreover, advertising makes a person want to buy more, resulting in over consumption. However, i believe this view doesnot justify why people become fat and obese in first place and banning junk food does not fix the problem.

I believe, junk food marketing does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned. Moreover, a person who is obese have to change their lifestyle. Furthermore, if a person is addicted to junk must lookup for healthier alternatives. In addition to this, being consistent will play a major role and this helps a lot, as the marketing can not change their mind.

In conclusion, junk food banning may seem like a strong resoponse but, I believe that changing the lifestyle and looking for better alternatives will be more effective. This will benefit both the society and the individual that sells the junk food so that we dont take away their bread and butter.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding the impact of junk food on metabolism and hormones is mentioned but not fully explained or supported with specific evidence. The second body paragraph is repetitive, focusing heavily on 'lifestyle' without exploring other factors. While the task is addressed, the arguments lack depth and the conclusion introduces a new, slightly irrelevant point about the 'bread and butter' of junk food sellers, which is not well-integrated into the main discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. Cohesive devices such as 'In addition', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore' are used to link sentences. However, some of these transitions feel mechanical or repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, though the flow between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother. The conclusion is a bit abrupt and introduces a new concept rather than summarizing the main points effectively. Overall, the structure is functional, but the use of cohesive devices lacks the flexibility required for a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There are some spelling errors (e.g., 'harmones' instead of 'hormones', 'resoponse' instead of 'response') and some awkward phrasing, such as 'take away their bread and butter'. While the student uses some topic-specific vocabulary like 'preservatives', 'metabolism', and 'over consumption', the range is limited. To achieve a higher score, the student should aim to use more sophisticated collocations and avoid repetitive phrasing like 'junk food' and 'lifestyle' throughout the essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('a person who is obese have to change', 'junk food disrupt the harmones') and punctuation errors (e.g., 'i' instead of 'I', missing commas). While these errors do not significantly impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. The student should focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring consistent verb forms.

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