Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is undeniable that junk food has become a pensive concern
among the youth. In this regards, Some people think that junk food advertising is main concern which leads to obesity while others think that junk food advertising can not be only reason for obesity and should not be banned. This essay will not only discuss not only both views but also my opinion which is in favour of former point of view in forthcoming fragments with logical conclusion.
To commence with, there are several outcomes supporting the first view. The prime one is that, young ones with wrong influence. To explain it, it is an era of internet and everyone uses internet and children in young ages sometimes got influenced by food vlogers posting videos of junk food by praising the junk food unnecessarily. For example, nowadays in India there are many videos of junk food on online platforms like YouTube , Instagram with millions of views and likes majorly of children. Secondly, old people attract to ads. To clarify it, most of the old people watch television and see ads of junk food due which they had craving to eat junk food which later can lead obesity due to less exercise in old ages. As a result, some times they eat to their limits and can have dangerous diseases.
Nevertheless, despite of having drawbacks of junk food advertising there are some benefits of the later statement. First and foremost is that, rather than junk food televisions and mobiles are also a reason. To write more, over using of televisions and mobiles also led to obesity because sometimes people see these while eating and laying on bed with zero presence to exercise and workout which also sometimes led to dangerous diseases. For example, a survey in local newspaper tells us that there are many people who had obesity due to over-watching of these electronics.
To conclude, although there are few other reasons for obesity rather than junk food such as overuse of televisions and mobiles. Yet, in my perceptive junk plays an important role in obesity.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses both views and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The arguments regarding the influence of social media on youth and the impact of advertising on the elderly are relevant but lack depth. The counter-argument regarding sedentary lifestyles is also somewhat underdeveloped. While the position is clear, the essay would benefit from more sophisticated reasoning and specific evidence rather than general observations. The conclusion is brief and does not fully synthesize the points discussed, which limits the overall impact of the response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence with', 'Nevertheless', and 'To conclude', but they are sometimes used in a mechanical or slightly unnatural way. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'the later statement', which does not accurately refer back to the previous argument. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs could be improved to ensure that each sentence flows more naturally into the next.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There are several instances of awkward word choices, such as 'pensive concern' (likely meant 'pressing concern'), 'young ones with wrong influence', and 'due which they had craving'. These errors occasionally impede the flow of the argument. While the student attempts to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'sedentary' or 'influence', the overall range is limited, and the phrasing often feels repetitive or unnatural, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Examples include 'In this regards', 'children in young ages', 'despite of having drawbacks', and 'in my perceptive'. Subject-verb agreement and preposition usage are inconsistent. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors is noticeable and affects the overall fluency of the writing. To improve, the student should focus on basic sentence construction and proofreading to eliminate minor errors in articles, prepositions, and word forms.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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