Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Society is divided into altruistic and egocentric mind-sets of people. Although some masses hold the viewpoint that in some societies, obesity is considered as a major problem. Many people believe that fast food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned because of individuals health issues and bad impact on society, I believe that the latter statement holds more important.
On the one hand, the main reason why some masses favor the former statement is because due to individual health problem. It due to fact that if a person eats a lot of junk food they should have some such as obesity and over weight. For instance, a survey conducted by Food and Health department has provided concrete evidence by highlighting that 40% of people is having health issues after eating junk food.
On the other hand, I believe that the latter point of view supporters give the major reason of bad impact on society in its favor. As they believe that by eating junk food will unsustain the enviornment and cause new disease everyday due to fast food.
To conclude, even though people support that individuals health issues and bad impact on the society.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 199 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While the essay attempts to address both views, the arguments are underdeveloped and lack sufficient depth or relevant examples. The position is stated in the introduction, but the conclusion is incomplete and fails to summarize the main points effectively. The lack of length prevents a full exploration of the topic, leading to a superficial treatment of the prompt. To improve, you must expand your arguments with more detailed explanations and specific, logical evidence to reach the required length.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. While some cohesive devices are used (e.g., 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand'), they are often followed by disjointed or confusing sentences. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the transition between ideas is mechanical. The conclusion is abrupt and does not effectively link back to the main body paragraphs. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas flow logically from one to the next using a wider variety of linking words and better referencing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'some masses' and 'the latter statement' are used awkwardly. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'unsustain the enviornment' and 'individual health problem'. The range of vocabulary is not sufficient to demonstrate the precision required for higher bands. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific collocations related to health and advertising, and try to use more precise synonyms to avoid repeating basic words like 'problem' or 'people'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Examples include 'if a person eats a lot of junk food they should have some such as obesity' and '40% of people is having health issues'. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the existing sentences often suffer from poor syntax and punctuation errors. Subject-verb agreement and article usage are inconsistent throughout the text. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like tense consistency and pluralization.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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