Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, obesity is considered to be a big problem for countries like USA. Some people believe it is due to excessive marketing of fast food while other contradict with this view thinking marketing should not be banned. I will discuss both sides and give my own opinion

Firstly, people who believe that advertising of junk food should be banned are right. As fast food marketing has a huge impact on the sales and it is bad for te health of the people. People mostly focus on easiness instead of their health and body's requirements. Marketing of such things make us feel that we should also try these knowing the fact that they are bad for our health. Or sometimes they don't even know about the ingredients being used. They think that marketing should be banned as it does not demonstrates whole truth.

Secondly, those who think that marketing of fast food does not causes obesity are those who have self control. They believe that a person should know what he consumes marketing has nothing to do with him he should workout if he eats fast food. There should be enough self consiousness in a person that he knows about

the benefits and harms of his food. Such people believe that it is laziness which causes such problems you cannot control ads on all bilboard of a highway but you can control your apetite.

In conclusion, a person should control himself rather than blaming entire world but also there should be some changings in fast food marketing like description about calories, fats and protein.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding the ban on advertising is repetitive, focusing on 'health' without exploring specific mechanisms like targeting children or the psychological impact of marketing. The second perspective is also underdeveloped, relying on the concept of 'self-control' without providing concrete examples or evidence. To reach a higher band, you should expand your arguments with specific examples, such as the impact of social media influencers or the role of government regulations in other countries, to provide a more comprehensive discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. You use basic linking words like 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the internal cohesion within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical. For example, the transition between sentences in the second paragraph is abrupt, and some referencing is unclear, such as 'those who think... are those who have self control'. To improve, try to use a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., 'consequently', 'furthermore', 'in contrast') and ensure that pronouns clearly refer back to the intended nouns to improve the flow of your arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. You rely on simple, repetitive terms like 'big problem', 'bad', and 'things'. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'other contradict with this view' (should be 'others contradict this view') and 'changings' (should be 'changes'). To achieve a higher score, you need to incorporate more academic and topic-specific vocabulary, such as 'public health crisis', 'consumer awareness', 'nutritional information', or 'regulatory measures'. Expanding your range of synonyms and using more precise collocations will significantly enhance the quality of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('marketing... does not causes'), missing articles ('on all bilboard'), and awkward phrasing ('it does not demonstrates whole truth'). While the meaning is generally clear, these errors are persistent. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, particularly subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Additionally, try to incorporate more complex structures, such as conditional sentences or relative clauses, while ensuring they are punctuated correctly to demonstrate greater control over your grammar.

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