Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In modern societies, obesity has become a serious problem among the world. Some individuals think that advertising related to junk food is the major factor of this problem and should be banned, while other people argue that there are several other factors depicts of this problem, so junk food advertising should not be completely banned. This essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own opinion.
On the one hand, some people think that junk food advertising can be persuaded people to eat unhealthy items by showing attractive visuals, celebrity endorsements and creative contents. To elaborate on this, individuals may prefer to watch advertisements because their favourite actors or actresses presenting them. Therefore, people may possess cravings to try that food items at least one time, then it would become permanent choices for them.
On the other hand, others notion that junk food advertising should be completely banned may not only the solution of obesity. This problem depends on individuals personal choice, curiosity and daily habits. To explain this, people may not control themselves by eating junk food, because of the dense smell and delicious taste of junk food can be mesmerized their mind. Therefore, people may show more attraction towards to the fast-food items.
In my opinion, i believe that unhealthy food items can definetly cause numerous illnesses like obesity, but their advertisements should be totally banned may not an appropriate way to find solution. Individuals should follow fitness activities such as gym, yoga, and running. Also, goverment authorities and companies should provide some educational programmes, which illustrates pros and cons of food products. Hence, the rate of comsuming fast-food may be decreased over the time.
To recapitulate, I accept that advertising can influance many people to eat junk food by presenting only positive sides and it causes problem of obesity. However, educational programmes and fitness ambition can be useful to reduce rate of consuming unhealthy food products.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both perspectives and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the impact of celebrity endorsements and the role of individual responsibility. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding educational programs is mentioned but not fully explored in terms of how they would specifically counteract the influence of advertising. The position is consistent throughout, but the depth of analysis could be improved to reach a higher band by providing more concrete examples or evidence to support the claims made.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'To recapitulate' are used to guide the reader through the argument. However, there is some mechanical use of these devices, and the flow between sentences is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing, such as 'others notion that' or 'there are several other factors depicts of this problem'. While the progression of ideas is generally clear, the internal cohesion within paragraphs could be smoother to improve the overall readability.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'endorsements', 'mesmerized', and 'recapitulate'. However, there are several instances of inaccurate word choice and collocation, such as 'depicts of this problem' instead of 'contributing to this problem', and 'fitness ambition' instead of 'fitness initiatives'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of the argument. A wider range of precise academic vocabulary would be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the writer attempts complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb forms and sentence construction, such as 'junk food advertising can be persuaded people' and 'should be totally banned may not an appropriate way'. Punctuation is generally functional, but there are errors in subject-verb agreement and preposition usage. The errors are noticeable and occasionally require the reader to re-read to grasp the intended meaning, which is characteristic of the 6.0 band.
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