Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
it is often argued that advertisement of junk food is the results of obesity which is creating a big issue while others tend that it does not relate with the obesity and should not be closed. I believe that it influence the people in a higher level. These essay will discuss both the views.
On the one hand ,many people believe that advertisement is not responsible for obesity. Advertisement is done for all the products but people donot get influenced through it and so they donot buy all the products they saw. People are responsible for the behaviour they do because everything that shown on television cannot be afford unless its the needy things. For example people only buy the things that are healthy like for kids or even themselves but food can never be the only thing they influenced in. Supporters of this view consequently argue that the avertisement should not be closed in any possible way.
on the other hand ,i believe that it influence the most of the individual out there. Many of the people get easily influenced and wants to try out new things which they constantly buy it if it turns out good. for instance, the advertisement of vape causes many yongster to get addict which results them in a serious condition.
In conclusion while some people support the idea of advertisement, others believe that it should be banned.I personally believe that it should be banned because it make people addict and something that cannot be rid of.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments are somewhat superficial; for instance, the claim that people only buy healthy food is a sweeping generalization that lacks nuance. The example regarding vaping is slightly off-topic, as the prompt specifically focuses on junk food advertising. To improve, you should provide more detailed explanations and relevant examples that directly support the link between junk food marketing and obesity. The conclusion is present but brief, and the overall development of the arguments needs more depth to reach a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inaccurate. For example, 'These essay' is grammatically incorrect, and the transition 'consequently' is used in a way that does not logically follow the preceding sentence. There is a lack of variety in linking words, and some sentences feel disjointed. To improve, focus on using a wider range of cohesive devices (such as 'furthermore', 'nevertheless', or 'consequently') more naturally and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that flows logically from the previous one.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and sophistication. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'should not be closed' (instead of 'banned' or 'restricted') and 'the needy things' (which is unclear). The repetition of the word 'influenced' and 'advertisement' suggests a limited range of vocabulary. To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific collocations related to health, marketing, and public policy. Avoid repeating the same words; instead, use synonyms and paraphrasing to demonstrate a broader lexical range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'it influence the most'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'results them in a serious condition'), and missing articles. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing around commas. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed accurately.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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