Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is acknowledged that in some societies people face the obesity problem, which are very common, some individuals think that advertising of junk food play an essential role in it and government should forbidden this, while other people believe that ads are not have significantly contribute in this issue so it would not be banned. In this essay, first i will discuss both the perspective then deduce my own opinion.

Proponents of the first view point maintain that. Advertising of junk food are very often to see on social media and public places, which encourage a lot of people to consume that food especially it big impact on children. To elaborate it, many advertising companies to increase for their food sale use creative ideas such as they use children favourite cartoons and famous celebrities. As a result, their fans purchased sugary beverages and fast food more considerably. Hence, a large number of people loss their healthy lifestyle and face obesity problems.

Advocates of the second view point contain that, advertising have not encourage anyone to eat unhealthy food they not should be banned, because companies have the right to advertise their product globally if government forbidden the ads so it may negative consequences for both, For instance,

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you address both perspectives, the second body paragraph is incomplete, ending abruptly after an introductory phrase. Consequently, the essay lacks a conclusion and a clear, consistent opinion. To improve, you must ensure all parts of the prompt are fully developed with sufficient supporting evidence and a clear personal stance. The current length prevents a full exploration of the arguments, leading to an under-developed response that does not meet the criteria for a higher band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay uses basic cohesive devices such as 'In this essay', 'Proponents of the first view', and 'For instance', which help to structure the text. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete nature of the second paragraph. Paragraphing is present, but the abrupt ending disrupts the logical flow of the argument. To improve, focus on ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a concluding thought that links back to the main argument. Using a wider range of linking words would also help to connect ideas more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. You use some relevant terms like 'obesity', 'consume', and 'sugary beverages', but there are issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'advertising of junk food play an essential role' (should be 'plays') and 'not have significantly contribute' (should be 'do not significantly contribute'). To improve, focus on using more sophisticated collocations and ensuring correct word forms. Avoid repetitive phrasing and try to incorporate more academic vocabulary related to the topic of public health and marketing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('advertising... play', 'advertising... are'), incorrect verb forms ('government should forbidden', 'not should be banned'), and missing articles. The sentence structures are relatively simple, and attempts at more complex sentences are often marred by errors. To improve, pay closer attention to basic grammar rules, particularly verb tenses and modal verb usage. Proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring that sentences are complete will significantly improve the accuracy and readability of your writing.

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