Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some societies consider obesity as a major problem. in this regard, people hold different views on advertising. some people view advertising as a significant factor that contributes to promotes obesity so it should be banned, While other think that advertising has no role in obesity and it should not be banned.

In this modern world, people are greatly influenced by social media and its presence is everywhere. Social media has a strong impact on our mindset, lifestyle and daily day routines. junk food companies knows the strength of social media and they are utilizing it at their best, so people wants to conform with the latest trends and having a junk food is considered as a modern and advanced lifestyle. People perceives it more convenient and easily accessible as compare to traditional cooking. so whenever they see a new food item is being introduced and advertised by their favorite celebrity or social media influence they tend to have same food in their own plate. however the fact they are least concerned about is serious health problems that may come with these junk foods. so its the responsibility of social mediate to bring awareness among people so they can be aware of their food choices an risk associated with them.

people who think that junk food advertising don't promotes obesity are of the view that there are other factors like family preferences, culture , genetic factor and as a whole society. as a matter of fact, these factor do have their importance when it comes to obesity.

in my opinion we have to take calculated approach and it cannot be denied that now a day we can not avoid junk food at all but we can create awareness amount people so they can limit the amount of junk food they are taking. we can share the healthy alternates through social media so people may lead to more healthy food choices.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the impact of social media is discussed in detail, the counter-argument regarding other factors like genetics and culture is underdeveloped and lacks specific examples. The conclusion is a bit repetitive and does not fully synthesize the points made earlier. To reach a higher band, ensure that each body paragraph provides concrete evidence or logical progression rather than just stating general observations. The position is clear, but the depth of analysis needs to be more consistent across all sections of the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, the transition 'in this regard' is used awkwardly, and there are several instances of missing or incorrect punctuation, such as starting sentences with lowercase letters ('in this modern world', 'people who think'). The flow between sentences is sometimes disjointed, making the progression of ideas feel less smooth. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring consistent paragraph structure would significantly enhance the coherence of the writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to express ideas clearly. There are some attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary such as 'conform', 'accessible', and 'alternates'. However, there are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'contributes to promotes' (should be 'contributes to promoting') and 'daily day routines' (redundant). Some phrasing is also slightly unnatural, such as 'having a junk food'. To improve, the student should focus on learning common collocations and ensuring that word forms are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('junk food companies knows', 'advertising don't promotes'), missing articles, and incorrect verb forms ('people wants to conform'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several sentences starting with lowercase letters and some run-on sentences. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be highly beneficial.

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