Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Nowadays,in some societies life style is regarded as a major problem is some food advertising is largely effect because they significant effect of children and junk food is very side effect for children .They do not shows teenagers.I strongly agree this statement . Whereas,I will discuss both views and given opinion upcoming paragraph.

To begin with,Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned because they effect of body.The major point is lack of awareness ,it is very for children yet people consume junk food. While its main reasons is it is very delicious and easy to prepare fast food.For example some shops shows advertising for children and societies because they shows only adults .These are easy to attractive for children.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 130 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While the prompt asks to discuss both views and provide an opinion, the response is fragmented and lacks the depth required for an academic essay. The arguments regarding the impact of advertising on children are repetitive and lack specific evidence or logical progression. Because the essay is severely under-length and the arguments are underdeveloped, it does not address all parts of the task effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The essay lacks a clear logical structure. While there is an attempt to use transition words like 'To begin with' and 'Whereas', they are used incorrectly or in contexts that do not facilitate a smooth flow of ideas. Paragraphing is present but does not effectively separate the two distinct viewpoints requested by the prompt. The referencing is often unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the writer's train of thought. Overall, the progression of ideas is disjointed and lacks the necessary cohesion for a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very limited and repetitive. The student relies on basic terms such as 'major problem', 'junk food', and 'children'. There is a lack of academic vocabulary or collocations appropriate for this type of essay. Word choice is often imprecise, such as 'junk food is very side effect for children', which is grammatically and semantically incorrect. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas, and the errors in word choice occasionally impede the reader's understanding of the intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are significant issues with sentence structure, such as 'Nowadays,in some societies life style is regarded as a major problem is some food advertising is largely effect'. Subject-verb agreement, article usage, and punctuation are consistently problematic throughout the text. The student uses almost exclusively simple sentence structures, and attempts at more complex sentences result in errors that distort the meaning. There is a lack of control over basic grammatical rules, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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