Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

What I believe is that, irrespective of the advertising, a person should be capable enough to decide for his own health. It is true that junk food is the main cause for obesity, but in the end it is your choice to make, whether to eat junk food or not. Although I think advertising junk food makes it more difficult for people to avoid eating them as they are more tasty and look fancy.

It is true that advertising is to largely blame for this problem and banning these is a very easy solution, but it is not that simple. Junk food is something that has been normalized in todays' world and I think the advertising doesn't really matter that much. The main problem is people and their choices, people must become mentally stronger and choose the right thing for their good health.

People who tell junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity are wrong. In todays' world the major reason for obesity is junk food. But directly banning the advertising would be an economic problem as too much money is involved. Too much money is made in the food industry. Businessmen do not care about obesity or the health of the people, they just want to make more money, so it is not so easy to ban these advertisements.

In conclusion, people have to decide what they should consume to stay healthy because banning advertisement is not so easy and if the person really wants to eat junk food, he will just eat it anyway. So, people have to become aware and start worrying more about their life rather than having tasty unhealthy food.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both sides of the argument and providing a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding the economic impact of banning advertisements is mentioned but not fully explored or linked back to the core issue of obesity effectively. The position is consistent, but the reasoning relies heavily on personal opinion rather than well-supported evidence or deeper analysis. To reach a higher band, you should aim to provide more specific examples or logical consequences for each viewpoint discussed, ensuring that the arguments are fully extended rather than just stated.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'Although', 'However', and 'In conclusion', to link your thoughts. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive. For example, the transition between the second and third paragraphs feels abrupt. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the use of 'these' in the third paragraph, which could be more precisely defined. Improving the variety and sophistication of your linking words would enhance the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'food industry' and 'consume'. However, the vocabulary is often basic and repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'junk food', 'problem', and 'money'. There are also some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'look fancy' and 'mentally stronger', which sound slightly unnatural in an academic context. To improve, try to incorporate more precise synonyms and collocations to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary and a more formal tone.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'decide for his own health' (should be 'decide for himself'), 'todays' world' (should be 'today's world'), and 'people who tell' (should be 'people who say'). Punctuation errors, particularly with apostrophes, are also present. While these errors do not significantly impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct article usage would help improve the accuracy of your writing.

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