Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In recent years, the concern for health problems has been created an intense debate among people. Nowadays, people enjoy eating fast food more than the healthy food and consequently it results into serious health issues. Some people believe that many companies are using too much advertising for their food products and it is the main cause of obesityand should be banned. some people argue that it is not the main problem. Taking the both sides of argument, I beleive that advertising is not the major issue, there are many other trends that cause health risks. In this essay I will explain some reasons in order to support my opinion.
Proponents of the first view, the individuals that are more concerned about advertising should be totally bannned. advertising made you to buy things that you not actually need. Fast food advertisements are desigened to be highly appealing, using bright colours and popular cartoon characters and celebrities. This constant exposure creates powerfull cravings. For instance, studies have shown that children who watch high volumes of televisionare significantly more likely to demand snacks and sugary drinks.
On the other hand,many contend that advertising is not the root cause of obesity and that a ban is not necessary. Obesity is the complex problem that is driven by sedentary lifestyles and personel choices. In this digital world, individulas have ultimate control over what they consume and blaming commercials.
In conclusion, while junk food marketing encourage healthy eating patterns, it is one piece of a large puzzle. Governement should focus on the public education
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views on junk food advertising and providing a clear personal opinion. The introduction outlines the two perspectives, and body paragraphs explore arguments for banning advertisements, such as appealing designs targeting children, alongside counter-arguments highlighting personal responsibility and sedentary lifestyles. However, some ideas remain slightly under-developed, and the conclusion is truncated and abrupt, cutting off mid-sentence ("while junk food marketing encourage healthy eating patterns, it is one piece of a large puzzle. Governement should focus on the public education"). This prevents the response from reaching a higher band score. Overall, the ideas are relevant, but greater depth and a complete conclusion are needed for Band 7.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a discernible structure. Paragraphing is attempted, with distinct sections for the introduction, body arguments, and conclusion. However, cohesion is frequently faulty or mechanical. There are awkward transitions and linking phrases, such as "Taking the both sides of argument, I beleive..." and "Proponents of the first view, the individuals that are more concerned about advertising should be totally bannned." Referencing and referencing pronouns are sometimes unclear, as seen in sentences like "advertising made you to buy things that you not actually need." Paragraphing boundaries are also slightly compromised by the incomplete conclusion. These issues place the response firmly in Band 5.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The writer uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common topics and phrases such as "sedentary lifestyles," "constant exposure," and "powerfull cravings." However, there are noticeable lexical errors and inappropriate word choices throughout the text, including spelling and morphological mistakes like "beleive," "desigened," and "Governement." Additionally, collocation and phrasing issues are present, such as "the concern for health problems has been created an intense debate" and "Obesity is the complex problem." These errors cause occasional strain for the reader, aligning the vocabulary profile with Band 5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like relative clauses ("children who watch high volumes of televisionare significantly more likely...") and conditional or causal links. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly regarding verb forms, tenses, articles, and word order. Examples include "has been created an intense debate," "results into serious health issues," "advertising made you to buy," and "televisionare" (spacing error). Punctuation and sentence boundary errors also occur, culminating in an incomplete final sentence. Due to the high frequency of errors that occasionally impede understanding, the grammar score is Band 5.
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