Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

society is divided into alruistic and egocentric mind sets of the people .Although some masses hold the view point obesity is not contributed by consuming fast food because of other health problems, I believe that junk food is major reason behind it of to much comsumption and high procession of junk food.

On the one hand , the some masses favour the junk food because it is easily available . This is due to fact that junk food are easily availabe, however it is costly , people give preefernce to this . It has mostly comman among youngsters. For instance, some people face obesstity because ogf other health issues such as stress .Therefore, they face health issues.

On the other hand, i beleive that fast food is major reason of obestity more consumption . To eleborate, some people it it on daily basis such as pizza, burger and other things and they avoid their homemade food .Another point to be given by them is it involves high oil. To justify, fast food involve lot of speices and oils ,which are deloius for one time but it cause serious health issue among people. Thus, people set limit on their food.

To conclude, even though people support that fast food is not banned,I believe that it cause obestify to the eaters because of high oil and more consumption reasons

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response addresses both views regarding whether junk food advertising causes obesity and provides the writer's own opinion. However, the ideas are quite limited, repetitive, and under-developed, with confusing phrasing such as 'obesity is not contributed by consuming fast food because of other health problems'. Furthermore, the response is 23 words short of the mandatory 250-word minimum, as it contains only 227 words. This negative length penalty restricts the task achievement score. Based on the overall partial development and word count failure, this merits a band 4.5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

Paragraphing is attempted, with distinct introductory, body, and concluding sections, though the body paragraphs lack clear internal logical progression and are very brief. Cohesive devices are used mechanically or inaccurately, such as 'On the one hand' followed confusingly by a discussion on availability and health issues rather than differing perspectives. Referencing is often unclear (e.g., 'Another point to be given by them'), which makes the flow disjointed and difficult to follow at times. This aligns with the band 5 descriptors.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic, repetitive, and contains numerous spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'alruistic', 'mind sets', 'comsumption', 'procession', 'availabe', 'preefernce', 'comman', 'obesstity', 'ogf', 'eleborate', 'it it', 'speices', 'deloius', and 'obestify'. While the writer attempts some less common topics-related words like 'obesity' and 'advertising', the high frequency of erroneous word forms and misspellings severely strains the reader and limits the score to a band 4.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response features a very limited range of grammatical structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty or incomplete, such as 'Although some masses hold the view point obesity is not contributed by consuming fast food because of other health problems, I believe that junk food is major reason behind it of to much comsumption and high procession of junk food.' There are persistent errors in article usage, preposition selection, and subject-verb agreement throughout the essay. These frequent errors cause significant difficulty for the reader, fitting the band 4.5 profile.

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