Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Obesity is a major health problem in our society it contributes to many diseases and mobility issues which cause a poor quality of life, in some cases it may lead even to death.

Since this is a big issue in our time a lot of people tend to blame the quality of the diet we follow each day which relies heavily on junk food. Studies have shown that fast food is very unhealthy its filled with grease a large amount of sodium and carbohydrates too much calories with very low nutritional value, other than the large amount of sugar that you can find in a Snickers bar. All of this not only lead to obesity but can cause major health problems like diabetes, high blood pressure, cloged veins and even cancer.

A lot of people think the problem is the advertisement industry of the junk food that tend to make it look delicious and healthy like for exemple eat cereal first thing in the morning its healthy cause its with milk even though the large amount of sugar in cereal is very unhealthy especially in the morning and for kids. The big companies marketing their products to make it feel and look okay to consume as your daily diet may be contributing to this problem. Personally i think that the advertisement is not the only issue we cant tell business men to not advertise to their products but we can educate people. Just like those campaigns to teach people on the dangers of smoking, we can do something like that to teach people on the dangerous of creating a diet full of junk food and how to make it healthy, try more and more to advertise healthy food and educate people is the way to make them healthy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the task partially, as required for this level. While the student attempts to discuss both views regarding junk food advertising and offers a personal opinion, the ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, the discussion of the opposing view on advertising is quite brief and relies heavily on a single example about cereal, rather than exploring broader socioeconomic or regulatory arguments. The personal opinion is introduced toward the end but lacks deep elaboration or clear support from strong examples. To reach a higher standard, the writer needs to present a fully developed position with well-extended arguments for both sides of the prompt, ensuring all aspects are thoroughly explored rather than merely touched upon.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organization present in the response, but it lacks a clear overall progression. The essay is divided into three blocks of text, but the second and third paragraphs are extremely dense, combining multiple distinct ideas—such as health consequences, advertising tactics, and educational solutions—into single, run-on structures without adequate separation. Furthermore, cohesive devices are frequently inadequate or missing, and referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the sudden shift from discussing fast food generally to mentioning a specific brand ('Snickers bar') without transitional support. Paragraphing is not used sufficiently and appropriately to guide the reader through the different stages of the argument. Improving paragraph structure and employing a wider range of logical connectors would significantly enhance the overall flow and coherence of the text.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey basic meaning. The writer demonstrates an ability to use some relevant topic-specific terms such as 'obesity', 'nutritional value', 'high blood pressure', and 'advertisement industry'. However, there are noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and spelling that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, such as 'cloged' instead of 'clogged', 'too much calories' instead of 'too many calories', and the informal phrasing 'business men'. The range of vocabulary lacks flexibility, and attempts to use less common lexical items often result in unnatural phrasing. To achieve a higher score, the student should expand their range of vocabulary, ensure correct word forms and spellings, and incorporate more precise, academic collocations to discuss health and marketing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response displays a limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple or poorly controlled complex sentences. There are frequent errors in punctuation and sentence boundaries, notably heavy run-on sentences and comma splices, such as in the opening sentence ('Obesity is a major health problem in our society it contributes to...'). Attempts at complex structures are often faulty, and issues with subject-verb agreement, articles, and preposition use persist throughout the text, including phrases like 'on the dangers' instead of 'to the dangers' and 'educate people on the dangerous'. These frequent errors require the reader to occasionally decode the intended meaning. Developing greater control over complex sentence patterns and mastering punctuation rules such as full stops and commas will greatly improve grammatical accuracy.

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