Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In certain Societies some people facing with an obesity issue related junk food. As we discussed related obesity problem there are allot of peoples are faced this issue in nowdays. In nowdays lifestyle, junk food, and pack foods which included with lotts of preservaties in thoses foods.

Due to some advertising is largly issue about this junk foods and some peoples discussed that these ads are been banned so people can aviod this food and included there protiens intake in foods, In nowdays obesity is large problem have been faced in countries and there are allot of men and womens are facing with there health issues. Due to obesity in small age they get some disease like sugar, BP and cholestrol, where need to taken medicines to control this health issue to maintain this health issue you should excerise and some walking in day to day life.

As per my idea and knowledge peoples should avoid junk foods to main there health issue and obesity problem and as per my experience people should also need to add protiens in their foods to avoid health issue. I support with this arguments beacuse in samll age there some people also loss their life with this problem. if we give some examples that 28 year man is traving for their job and I have seen that he faced an heart stroke and loss their life in just few minutes. I would suggest that maintain lifestyle, avoid junk food and add some protien in their food intake to avoid this obesity and health issues.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the task only minimally. While it touches upon the topic of obesity and junk food advertising, the position is not always clear, and the ideas are limited and under-developed. The writer mentions that advertising is a large issue and suggests banning ads to help people avoid junk food, but this main prompt requirement is not fully explored or systematically discussed against both views. Furthermore, the discussion tends to drift into general statements about health issues and personal anecdotes, such as the example of a 28-year-old man, rather than presenting a structured academic debate on the two perspectives provided in the task instructions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Information and ideas are not arranged in a fully coherent manner, leading to a lack of clear overall progression. Although the text is divided into paragraphs, the internal structure of these paragraphs is weak. Sentences often follow one another without clear logical links, and referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. Cohesive devices are used very minimally and sometimes inaccurately, such as repetitive transitions like 'In nowdays lifestyle' and 'As per my idea', which disrupt the flow of the writing and fail to guide the reader smoothly through the response.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with noticeable errors that strain the reader's comprehension. The writer attempts some topic-related vocabulary such as 'obesity', 'preservatives', and 'cholesterol', but these are often affected by spelling and word-form errors, as seen in 'pack foods', 'largly', 'preservaties', and 'protiens'. There is a heavy reliance on simple, everyday words, and imprecise word choices—such as 'get some disease like sugar' instead of 'diabetes'—restrict the response to a limited range that struggles to convey precise meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical range is very limited, consisting mostly of simple and attempted complex sentences that contain frequent errors. There are persistent mistakes in verb forms, tenses, subject-verb agreement, and articles throughout the text, such as 'people facing with an obesity issue', 'there are allot of peoples are faced', and 'where need to taken medicines'. Punctuation is also problematic, with run-on sentences lacking appropriate structure. These frequent grammatical errors cause significant difficulty for the reader and distort the meaning in several places.

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