Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Obesity has became a serious health problem in many socities, Some people believed that junk food advertising is responsible for this problem, and they thought that kind of ad will be banned. while other think that this is not main problem for obesity and in their opinion junk food advertisement should not be banned. This essay will discuss about both views.

Actually in today's era obesity is becoming the major problem for yougester,

Many people such as teenagers, children are easily influence from internet and when junk food types ad appears in their mobile or laptop they demand for that. Advertisement companies show their unhealthy food more attractive and colourful packaging became attractive for people. Celebrites and some other influencer encourage people to consume that food . so junk advertisment can appear obesity.

On the one hand, some people believe that only junk food advertisment does not appear obesity there is other lot of reasons like , lack of exercise , sitting whole day at computer desk, not doing physical activities are also the main reason of gaining weight. so that's why some people think that junk food advertisement is not only the reason of overweight but also above mention reason can be appear as obesity. So, basically, banning junk food adverisement is not the permanant solution, this can be done for a while,

In conclusion, junk food ad can be the reason of obesity but banning their ads is not perfect solution but helps for a some time, there is another reason of this problem so people have to think about that.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both views on junk food advertising and providing a personal opinion, placing it in the mid-range for task achievement. However, the ideas are limited and under-developed, which keeps the response at this level. For instance, the discussion on why advertisements are influential or why other factors contribute to obesity is brief and lacks fully extended supporting examples. The writer presents a clear position that advertising contributes to obesity but banning it is not a permanent solution, yet this position is not fully realised throughout the text due to the lack of detailed elaboration. To move to a higher band, the writer should ensure that each point regarding both sides of the argument and the personal stance is thoroughly supported with specific explanations and examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates some organisation, but it lacks a clear overall progression. Paragraphing is attempted, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but the logical flow between sentences and ideas is sometimes disrupted. Cohesive devices are used, but they are often inadequate, inaccurate, or repetitive, such as the frequent reliance on simple transition phrases like 'On the one hand' followed by muddled referencing. For example, sentences within the second body paragraph jump between different ideas without smooth transitional links, making the progression mechanical. To achieve a higher band, the writer needs to improve the logical sequencing of ideas and use a wider variety of cohesive devices more accurately and naturally, ensuring that each paragraph has a clear central topic and progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey the basic message of the essay. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary and topic-related terms, such as 'obesity', 'advertisement', and 'physical activities', but there are noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. Examples of lexical inaccuracies include 'became' instead of 'become', 'socities' instead of 'societies', 'yougester' instead of 'youngsters', 'influence' instead of 'influenced', and 'advertisment' instead of 'advertisement'. To improve to a higher band, the writer must expand their lexical range, demonstrate better control over word formation and spelling, and use less common vocabulary more accurately and naturally in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response shows a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside some attempts at complex sentences that are frequently faulty. There are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, including issues with verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and missing articles. For instance, phrases like 'Obesity has became a serious health problem', 'Some people believed that...', and 'this can be done for a while' demonstrate a lack of control over tense consistency and sentence boundaries. Punctuation errors, such as missing capital letters at the beginning of sentences and incorrect comma splices, are also noticeable throughout the text. To reach a higher band, the writer needs to incorporate a greater variety of complex sentence structures and significantly reduce the frequency of basic grammatical errors by checking for agreement, tense consistency, and correct punctuation.

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