Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

For several societies, people who have weight more than average of their age group considered as main issue. By some individuals it is argued that promoting junk food is hugely responsible for this situation and that should be require to stop immediatly, While others believe that it is not accountable for the problem of obesity and should not be stopped. I will discuss both views in upcoming paragraphs.

On the one hand, people are widely attracted towards junk food without thinking of their health. Because, they are being lazy to make food at home and eat healthy food so they consume instant food which is very harmful to their health. These foods are very inhygenic and it has lots of fat, cholestrol, and sugars. Also young people and children loves to eat outside food and sometimes they do not have knowledge of the ingredients containing that food. Reason for that is they watch advertiesment of that food on somewhere and they tend to eat junk food. The majority of food companies extremely promote their product to increase sell and people influence by watching advertisement.

On the other hand, people think that these companies are not responsible for problem of obesity. Because these companies just making profit from that advertiesment but individuals should have to control them selves to be healthy. Nowadays, people are not doing any physical activities to stay fit so increase in weight is not questionable. People should understand that the junk foods are not good for their health and avoid to consuming repeatedly. For being healthy they should eat homemade food follow diet and do physical activities to stay away from obesity.

From my perspection, I strongly agree with banning advertiesment who encourage people to eat junk food because it is responsible for obesity. Most of the people lose their control for having healthy food just watching the advertiesment so this should be largely blamed for obesity.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state your own position: you explain that advertising can encourage people, especially young people, to choose unhealthy food, while also noting personal responsibility and inactivity. This covers the main parts of the prompt. However, the discussion is only partly developed. For example, the claim that people are attracted to junk food because they are “lazy to make food at home” is broad and would benefit from a specific explanation or example. The opposing view is also presented briefly, without exploring how advertising may have limited influence compared with diet or exercise. Your opinion is clear at the end, but its reasoning largely repeats the first view. Develop and support each side more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a concluding opinion. “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help signal the contrast, so readers can follow the overall direction. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes weak: several claims are placed next to one another without showing clearly how they connect, and the conclusion repeats the point about advertising rather than drawing the discussion together. Some linking is mechanical, and sentence openings such as “Because” create fragments rather than smooth connections. Use clearer cause-and-effect links and refer back to ideas precisely; for instance, explain how advertising influences children before moving to companies’ sales motives.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “obesity,” “physical activities,” “ingredients,” and “advertisement,” and you attempt to express ideas about health, responsibility, and promotion. This gives the response enough topic-related language to communicate its main points. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems make the writing less precise, such as “weight more than average,” “increase sell,” “inhygenic,” and “lose their control.” Repetition of “junk food” and “advertisement” also limits flexibility. Aim for more natural combinations and accurate forms, such as “excess body weight,” “boost sales,” and “lose control,” while checking spelling and choosing precise terms for the people or companies involved.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses with “because” and “so,” and the reader can generally understand your main argument. However, the range is limited, and attempts at complex sentences often contain errors. For example, “people who have weight more than average of their age group considered” is missing a verb and has an incomplete structure; “young people and children loves” has subject–verb disagreement; and “people influence by watching advertisement” lacks the required passive verb form. There are also sentence-boundary problems, as in “Because, they are being lazy…” and the capitalised “While” after a comma. Practise complete clauses, agreement, articles, and punctuation, then vary sentence patterns while keeping each sentence controlled.

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