Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There are split opinions regarding whether junk food advertising contributes to the problem of obesity or not. The following essay woulf discuss both the views at to conclude it would conclude with my opinion.

On one hand, people think advertisement of fast food usally targets the younger generation as they are inclined towards eating junk food for example pizza, burger, etcetra. Moreover, youth does not usually have requisite maturity to understand the disadvantages of unhealthy diet. Furthermore, they are not at all aware of the process of making of the former. For instance, the tikki used in burgers are usually frozen and such type of food plays a vital role for causing obesity to people.

On the other hand, some people believe that there is no role of advertisement in causing obesity. It is an individual's responsibility to choose wisely what one wants to consume, almost everyone know that food which contain alot if calories are not good for health and these foods contain calories in excessive amounts. So, from this point of view advertisement does not contribute in people having unhealthy body.

To conclude, I believe that advertising various offers of cheap meals encourage people to have type of meals which are not very healthy for them, and it is obvious that cheaper the meal gets, more the quality is compromised. Therefore, people should not opt for what is cheap but for what is heathy for their well being. Thus, i believe that advertising junk food must be banned as it is taking our youth away from living a healthy life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You discuss both positions and state your own view clearly: you argue that advertising encourages unhealthy choices and should be banned. The points about young people being influenced by advertising and individuals having responsibility are relevant to the question. However, the discussion is only partly developed. For example, the claim that frozen burger patties cause obesity does not explain how advertising itself contributes, and the opposing view is mostly asserted rather than supported with an example or explanation. Your conclusion also shifts towards cheap meals and compromised quality, which is not fully established in the body paragraphs. Develop each side with clearer reasoning and evidence, and keep the argument focused on advertising’s role and whether a ban is justified.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. The signposts “On one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude” make the direction of the discussion easy to follow. However, some links are mechanical, and the progression within paragraphs is not always clear. In the first body paragraph, the move from young people’s maturity to frozen burger patties does not clearly connect back to advertising. The second paragraph also repeats the point about calories without developing the reasoning. The introduction’s wording about discussing both views and concluding with an opinion is awkward and does not preview the position. Use clearer links between claims and explanations, and make each paragraph build one central argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “obesity,” “advertisement,” “unhealthy diet,” “calories,” and “maturity,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “requisite maturity” and “plays a vital role.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors reduce precision: “split opinions,” “advertisement of fast food,” “alot,” “etcetra,” and “heathy.” Some expressions are vague or unnatural, such as “unhealthy body” and “the former.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and avoid unnecessary repetition of “food” and “advertisement.” More precise terms for influence, dietary choices, and public-health effects would help express the argument more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “as,” “that,” and “which,” and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, control is uneven, particularly in longer sentences. For example, “It is an individual's responsibility to choose wisely what one wants to consume, almost everyone know…” joins two independent clauses with only a comma, and “almost everyone know” has a subject–verb agreement error. Other examples include “the tikki used in burgers are” and “food which contain,” where singular/plural agreement is inconsistent. The opening sentence also contains a faulty construction: “would discuss both the views at to conclude it would conclude.” Work on sentence boundaries, agreement, and constructing clear complex sentences; these errors sometimes make the reader pause to interpret your meaning.

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