Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent times, the widespread of obesity has become increasingly alarming, prompting heated debate about its consequences. The advertisement work as a double-edge sowrd.A group of people argue that the advertising companies are the leading source, while other believes that media is not participating their role. However, i firmly believe that advertising has its strong impact because it imitates the mass audience. This essay will discuss both views before reaching conclusion that food marketing has an influence.

To begin with, the supporters of the idea believe that food advertisement is a driving force of obesity, so it must be banned. since, it immitates the audience by presenting their fake nutritional values. A large population starts to rely on them and take all these food items in their diet. Consequentally, eating disorder may capture the community. For example, billboards with KFC burger advertisement placed at high buildings influence strongly.

On the other hand, the advocates of the idea believe that societal eating patterns are entirely developed through their parents and family system. Since all the availability of food is provided by them. If a child continue to eat fastfood items without parental control, will eventually face the bad effects, such as nutritional deficency, eating disorder, stomachache, and weight gain.As a result, parental check and balance is needed to avoid consumption of unhealthy things. For instance, students who are under parental supervision are less prone to bad habits of excessive eating then others. Thus,authority plays a significant role other than advertisement.

In conclusion, advertisement plays a pivotal role in thought construction especially related to food choice. But i believe that it should not be banned because it can restrict through proper parental supervision.Authorities should provide educational campaign to nip the problem in the bud.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a position: advertising influences food choices, but you oppose a ban and favour parental supervision and education. This gives the response a relevant overall direction. However, the discussion is only partly developed. The case for banning advertising relies mainly on the claim that adverts imitate audiences and present false nutritional values; the opposing view focuses on parents, without explaining why advertising itself has little effect or why a ban would be ineffective. Your conclusion also introduces educational campaigns without developing how they would address the problem. To strengthen the response, explain each side’s reasoning more fully and support it with specific, relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting contrasting views, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “To begin with,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the discussion. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Since all the availability of food is provided by them” is a fragment and does not clearly connect the family’s role to the claim about eating patterns. The shift from parental supervision to “Thus, authority plays a significant role other than advertisement” is also abrupt. Improve progression by making the relationship between each claim and its supporting example explicit, and use referencing and linking phrases more precisely.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “widespread,” “nutritional values,” “parental supervision,” and “pivotal role.” These choices show an effort to discuss causes and possible responses rather than relying only on basic terms. However, inaccurate word choice, collocation, and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make ideas difficult to interpret. “The advertisement work as a double-edge sowrd” is unclear, while “imitates the mass audience” does not express the intended influence. Errors such as “immitates,” “Consequentally,” and “deficency” also reduce precision. Build accuracy by learning common collocations for advertising and influence, and proofread spelling and word forms. More precise vocabulary would make your arguments clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional sentence beginning “If a child continue to eat fastfood items…” and a contrast introduced by “However.” This shows some range, but control is inconsistent, and errors occur often enough to affect clarity. For example, “other believes” has subject–verb disagreement, and “If a child continue …, will eventually face” lacks a clear subject in the main clause. “Since all the availability of food is provided by them” is an incomplete sentence, while punctuation and capitalisation are also unreliable. Practise forming complete clauses, checking agreement and verb forms, and separating sentences correctly. Aim for accurate complex sentences before adding further complexity.

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