Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-10
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In several civilizations, a major problem has been observed, which is obesity. Most people have the mindset that the problem arises from the advertising of junk food, and it should be banned. Others think that food advertising is not involved in the problem of obesity and should not be banned. Arguing that the blame lies with junk food advertising is consequently a wrong idea; until now we don't see anybody in our society that they feel the obesity and the reason is advertising of junk food is countribute in this.
On the one hand, there is no relation between obesity and junk food advertising. However, there is a link between junk food and obesity. Showing ads to people to promote their business is a human right, and people should not want to compromise on these sorts of things. However, awareness is a must for people so that they avoid eating junk food. Recently, an article was shared by the BBC in which it was written that 67% of the public are busy eating junk food in Nigeria, which will bring a massive rise in obesity in the next few years; therefore, awareness is an important step for preventing people from this sort of eating, and the ban is not an easy solution.
On the other h
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response recognises the two positions and gives a view against banning advertising, but it addresses the task only minimally. The opening is difficult to interpret: “Arguing that the blame lies with junk food advertising is consequently a wrong idea” is followed by a sentence that does not clearly explain the writer’s reasoning. The first body paragraph mainly discusses awareness and the right to advertise, while the opposing view—that advertising can encourage unhealthy choices—is not developed. The BBC statistic is relevant in principle, but its connection to advertising is unclear. The response contains 207 words, below the required 250; the 9 words copied from the prompt are excluded. Develop both views with clear explanations and relevant examples, then state and support your own position directly.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
There is an attempt to organise the response using an introduction and the signposts “On the one hand” and “On the other h…”. However, the essay ends mid-phrase, so the second side of the discussion and the conclusion are absent, leaving no complete progression. Within the first body paragraph, “there is no relation between obesity and junk food advertising” is immediately followed by “there is a link between junk food and obesity”; the relationship between these points is not explained. The BBC example also appears without a clear link to the preceding claim. Plan one paragraph for each view and a concluding paragraph, and use linking phrases to show how each example supports the point being made.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The response uses some topic-related vocabulary, including “obesity,” “junk food advertising,” “awareness,” and “preventing,” so the main subject is generally identifiable. However, the range is limited and several choices or combinations are unnatural or unclear, such as “in several civilizations,” “busy eating junk food,” and “preventing people from this sort of eating.” The phrase “the reason is advertising of junk food is countribute in this” also makes the intended meaning difficult to follow. Aim for more precise collocations and avoid repeating broad terms such as “problem” and “people.” For example, describe advertising as “promoting energy-dense foods” and explain that it may “influence purchasing and eating habits.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response attempts some longer sentence forms, including a relative clause in “a major problem has been observed, which is obesity” and a clause introduced by “so that.” However, the range is limited, and errors in sentence construction and verb forms frequently make ideas difficult to understand. For example, “we don't see anybody in our society that they feel the obesity” has an unclear clause structure, while “the reason is advertising of junk food is countribute in this” contains faulty clause construction and verb form. There are also problems with agreement and articles in “67% of the public are busy eating.” Practise building clear subject–verb sentences first, then combine them with accurate subordinate clauses and check punctuation.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.