Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

People have different views about the problem of obesity. While some people think that the advertisement of junk food is the only reason for increasing obesity, I believe junk food advertisement is not the only problem, and it should not be banned.

There are a number of reasons why I believe rising obesity is not only for advertisement of junk food. One possible reason is that nowadays people are becoming lazier than in the past, and they are not willing to do physical exercise. For example, there are a lot of people who think that physical exercise is a waste of time and that there is no benefit of doing this. As a result, they are getting weaker day by day because of their laziness. Another reason is that most of the people do not maintain a proper diet, despite having enough chances and ability. For instance, most of the people have no routine for their daily meals; they just eat whenever their feeling hungry. For this, obesity is increasing day by day, and people just blame the advertisement of junk food.

Notwithstanding the above arguments, there are a few effects of junk food advertisements on rising obesity. For example, sometimes people feel hungry whenever they see an advertisement for junk food, and thats why people buy junk food and eat it, despite being unhealthy. As a result, they are increasing their weight because junk food always contains some chemicals for good taste.

In conclusion, although sometimes junk food advertisements are responsible for rising obesity, I would argue that most of the time public awareness is the main culprit.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You present a clear view: advertising is not the only cause of obesity and should not be banned. You also discuss both sides, noting that adverts can prompt people to buy unhealthy food, while inactivity and poor eating routines are other causes. These points are relevant, but the two perspectives are not developed equally: the case for banning advertising is brief, and the claim that people become hungry when they see an advert would benefit from explanation or a specific example. Your conclusion introduces “public awareness” as the main culprit, but this idea is not clearly established in the body paragraphs. Develop the opposing view more fully and make the conclusion follow directly from the arguments presented.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate body paragraphs and a conclusion. The progression from other causes of obesity to the influence of advertising is generally easy to follow, and phrases such as “For example” and “As a result” help signal relationships between ideas. However, some linking is mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “For example” and “As a result,” and the final paragraph shifts to “public awareness” without a clear link to the preceding discussion. Some references are also imprecise, such as “For this,” which makes the connection between diet and rising obesity less smooth. Use a wider range of transitions and make each paragraph’s central point connect explicitly to your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to discuss the topic, including relevant terms such as “physical exercise,” “proper diet,” “public awareness” and “junk food advertisements.” The meaning is generally clear, but several phrases are repetitive or imprecise, which limits the range and naturalness of the language. For instance, “rising obesity” and “day by day” recur, while “the only reason for increasing obesity” and “chemicals for good taste” are not precise ways to express the intended ideas. There are also word-form and spelling slips, including “thats” and “their feeling hungry.” Aim for more accurate collocations and varied topic vocabulary, such as “contribute to weight gain” or “highly processed foods,” and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a concessive opening (“While some people think…”) and clauses introduced by “despite” and “because.” Most sentences communicate their meaning, and errors rarely prevent understanding. Some grammatical inaccuracies remain, however. In “most of the people have no routine…; they just eat whenever their feeling hungry,” the clause should be “whenever they feel hungry.” The phrase “there is no benefit of doing this” would be more accurately formed as “there is no benefit to doing this,” and “despite being unhealthy” has an unclear subject. Continue using complex structures, but check pronoun forms, clause relationships and punctuation so that the links between ideas are consistently clear.

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