Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

IN SOME PLACES, OVERWEIGHT IS CONSIDERED TO BE A VERY BIG PROBLEM. MASSES HAVE THE OPINION THAT MARKETING OF STREET FOOD IS MAJORLY TO PINPOINT FOR THIS PROBLEM AND SHOULD BE BANNED. ON THE OTHER HAND OTHERS BELIEVE THAT THE MARKETING OF PROCESSED FOOD IS NOT BE BLAMED AND SHOULD NOT BE BANNED. IN THE FOLLOWING ESSAYS BOTH VIEWS WILL BE DISCUSSED AND A SUMMARISED CONCLUSION WILL BE PRESENTED AT THE END.

PROCESSED FOODS ARE MAJORLY RESPONSIBLE FOR OBESITY IN HUMANS AS MANY FOOD ITEMS ARE MADE WITH THE IDEA OF MAXIMUM PROFIT AND ENHANCED TASTE TO MAKE CUSTOMERS ADDICTED, BECUASE OF WHICH THE ONES WHO MAKE SUCH FOODS MANY A TIMES CUT CORNERS IN MAKING THEM AND USE INGREDIENTS THAT MAY NOT HARM MUCH IF TAKEN SEPARATELY WITH HOME-COOKED FOODS BUT HARMS HUMAN BODIES WHEN COME TOGETHER AND ARE CONSUMED ON A REGULAR BASIS. FOR EXAMPLE SATURATED OILS TO PREPARE FOOD ITEMS, HIGH DOSAGE OF SUGAR AND OTHER SWEETNERS IN BEVERAGES, USE OF FOOD COLORING IN UNAUTHORIED QUANTITIES FOR BETTER APPERANCE OF THE CONSUMABLE ITEM.

BUT THE HARMFUL SIDE OF STREET FOODS IS SO PREVALANT BECAUSE OF THE UNHEALTHY LIFE STYLE EVERY HUMAN BEING IN CURRENT TIMES. PEOPLE ARE EATING OUT ON A VERY FREQUENT BASIS, DUE WORK-LIFE IMBALANCE THE SLEEP CYCLE OF THE WORKING AND EVEN NON-WORKING CLASS ID DISTURBED WITH RANDOM TIME SNACKING, IN ADDITIONS TO THIS, LACK OF PHYSICAL ACTIVITIES ALSO CONTRIBUTE TO THE CAUSE OF OBESITY AS PEOPLE ARE GETTING VERY HIIGH CALORIFIC VALUE FROM JUNK FOOD BUT DUE TO THEIR WORK OR OTHER THINGS ARE NOT BEING ABLE TO PERFORM THE REQUIRED PHYSICAL ACTIVITY THE UTILISE THE EXCESS CALORIES CONSUMED. ASLO, STRESS IS A MAJOR CONCERN, IN SOME CASES STRESS CAN CAUSE THE STATE IN WHICH HUMAN BODY DOES NOT FEEL HUNGRY MAKING A PERSON LOSE WEIGHT DRASCTICALLY OR MAY CAUSE THE DIGESTIVE SYSTEM TO NOT FUNCTION PROPERLY AND FATS GET ACCUMULATED OR MAKES THE PERSON FEEL HUNGRY AND MAKES THEM EAT MORE AND MORE.

PROCESSED FOOD ADVERTISEMENT DOES NOT DEPICTS THE CORRECT PICTURE BUT IT IS NOT THE ONLY OR EVEN A MAJOR CAUSE OF OBESITY AS THERE ARE OTHER FACTORS THAT CONTRIBUTE EQUALLY IN OBESITY. IN CONCLUSION, JUNK FOODS ADVERTISEMENTS SHOULD BE REGULATED TO MORE INTENSIVELY TO PROTECT THE INTEREST OF COMMON PUBLIC BUT BANNING IT COULD CAUSE MORE WIDESPREAD MISINFORMATION AS THEN PEOPLE WILL HAVE WORD OF MOUTH AS THE ONLY ALTERNATIVE, WHICH CAN BE EASILY MANIPULATED THROUGH BIAS OR OVERTIME AS THE MESSAGE IS DELIVERED TO MANY PEOPLE.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the debate and give a position: advertising should be regulated rather than banned. The discussion of other contributors to obesity—limited physical activity, disrupted routines and stress—also shows relevant awareness of the issue. However, the two views are not developed equally. The paragraph about processed food focuses mainly on how products are made and their ingredients, rather than explaining how advertising encourages consumption or why it should be banned. The opposing view is clearer, but the conclusion’s claim that a ban would leave word of mouth as the only alternative is not fully explained. To strengthen the response, directly explain the persuasive effect of advertising, then support the case against a ban with a specific example or reason.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two main discussion paragraphs and a conclusion. The contrast between the paragraphs is signalled by “But,” and the final paragraph returns to the question of regulation, so the reader can follow the broad direction. However, progression within the long body paragraphs is uneven. The second body paragraph moves from lifestyle and work routines to exercise and then stress, with several ideas crowded into one sentence. Some links are also unclear, such as the relationship between the discussion of processed food ingredients and the claim about advertising. Use shorter sentences, give each paragraph a clear central point, and connect examples explicitly to the argument. This would make the organisation less mechanical and improve clarity.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “saturated oils,” “calorific value,” “physical activity” and “word of mouth.” These choices show an effort to discuss health and advertising beyond basic terms. However, inaccurate or unnatural wording is noticeable and sometimes makes the intended meaning harder to follow. For example, “marketing of street food” does not consistently match the task’s focus on junk-food advertising, while “majorly to pinpoint” and “the harmful side … is so prevalent because of the unhealthy life style” are awkward expressions. There are also spelling errors such as “becuase,” “apperance” and “authoried.” Aim for precise collocations and check spelling; using familiar, accurate phrases is more effective than forcing complex wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt complex sentences, including explanations with “because of which” and a contrast introduced by “but,” and you use some varied sentence openings. However, control is inconsistent, particularly in the long sentences, where clauses are joined without clear punctuation. Examples include “the ones who make such foods many a times cut corners … but harms human bodies” and “the required physical activity the utilise the excess calories.” Agreement and verb-form errors also occur, as in “ingredients … harms” and “advertisement does not depicts.” These problems can make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise breaking complex ideas into shorter sentences, checking subject–verb agreement and verb forms, and using commas and full stops to mark clause boundaries.

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