Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the contemporary era, obesity is the globalization concern. Due to consumption of junk food, sugary and beverage products, every one person out of three person can suffer from the obesity. Some people believe that obesity is occured by junk food advertisement, so it should be banned, however others believe that they are also other reasons for the obesity such as lacking excercise, sedentary life-style. Therefore I believe that the advertisement major influence consumer to take junk food but other reasons also affects in the obesity.

One of the primary reasons is that advertisement. In recent years, people have an advance technologies such as mobile phone and social media and used it significantly. So, people costantly expose to the advertisement. Nowadays, all companies prompte their brand on the social media such as Instagram, You Tube and Twitter. Because of that, consumers attract new things such as Burgers, Pizzas, Sandwich and soft sugar drinks. This view can be seen in over all world, where teenagers consume these type of products frequently and increase Body Metablic Index. Therfore, people believe that these types of advertisment should be banned so reduce consumption of junk food.

On the flip side, another significant reasons is that sedentry life style. People busy on their professional carrers and have no time for the exercises. Therfore, they increase their weight and fat level. Moreover, shops uses saturated fatty acids on the fast food, that directly impact on our metabolism. For instance, some scientific reports revel that main cause of obesity is that sedentry life style, consumption of saturated fatty acids and lake of exercise.

To recapitulate, advertisment influence many people to consume junk food and other beverages products so I believe some advertisment should be banned. Nevertheless, other reasons are also significant impact on the obesity.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and give a clear overall position: advertising influences consumption, but other factors also contribute to obesity, and some advertising should be banned. The two body paragraphs are relevant, with examples such as social-media promotion and sedentary lifestyles. However, the views are not developed equally: the case against banning advertising is mainly presented as a list of other causes, rather than explaining why advertising itself has limited influence or why a ban would be ineffective. The claim that advertising increases BMI also needs clearer support, and the conclusion does not specify which advertising should be restricted. Develop each side with a fuller explanation and a concrete, relevant example to make the argument more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction states your position, separate paragraphs discuss advertising and lifestyle, and a conclusion restates your view. Linking phrases such as “On the flip side,” “Moreover,” and “To recapitulate” help signal movement between points. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Therefore” is used to introduce your opinion even though the preceding sentence does not establish that conclusion, and “This view” does not clearly identify which idea it refers to. The second body paragraph also shifts from lack of exercise to fatty acids without explaining how these points relate. Use more precise referencing and build a clear sequence within each paragraph: claim, explanation, and supporting example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “sedentary life-style,” “saturated fatty acids,” “metabolism,” and “consumers,” which helps communicate the subject. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “primary reasons” and “scientific reports.” However, inaccurate word forms, spelling, and collocations are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less natural: “globalization concern,” “advance technologies,” “increase Body Metablic Index,” and “advertisment” are examples. Some expressions are also imprecise, such as “soft sugar drinks” and “other beverages products.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully. A smaller number of well-chosen terms used precisely would strengthen the argument more than repeated or awkward phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a subordinate clause in “Because of that, consumers attract new things…” and a contrast structure in the introduction. The overall meaning is generally understandable, but errors in sentence construction and grammatical control occur across the response. For example, “Some people believe that obesity is occured by junk food advertisement” has an incorrect passive form, while “another significant reasons is” has a number-agreement problem. Articles and sentence patterns also need attention, as in “One of the primary reasons is that advertisement.” Some long sentences join ideas without clear grammatical links, particularly in the final paragraph. Practise accurate clause construction, subject–verb agreement, and articles, then proofread each sentence for a complete and clear structure.

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