Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In a handful of societies, Obesity is grown to be a major concern. Few believe that the leading cause for this is junk food advertising and banning it would be a solution; However, others think that junk food advertising is not a contributor to the problem and should remain unbanned

By the accelerating rate with which the fast food market is growing, A large amount of advertisements related to new cuisines and menus resurface onto city billboards and on social media. Many think this to be the cause of leading obesity numbers within people. According to their perspective, obseity is caused by tempting people into buying more fast food; Hence getting them addicted to eating unhealthy meals on a regular basis. They believe banning such media will decrease the obesity numbers within people

However, many think otherwise. They believe that Obesity is caused by own unhealthy lifestyles ,not anywhere related to the advertisements, and that poor management of one's diet and lack of excercise due to fatigue and laziness may be the leading cause of the issue at hand. They believe there is no meaning to banning advertisements based on fast food, as it will not bring significant change to the concern.

I personally feel that junk food advertisements are not an attributor to this problem. I have rarely seen people going to restaurants or other fast food places based of of any new advertisements or posts they saw. I believe poor self care to be the factor contributing to this issue

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You discuss both positions and state your own view clearly: you explain that supporters of a ban see advertising as encouraging people to buy and regularly eat unhealthy food, while opponents attribute obesity to lifestyle and diet. This covers the main parts of the prompt. However, the discussion is only partly developed. The claim that advertising can make people “addicted” is asserted rather than supported, and the opposing view is also presented in broad terms. Your personal opinion—that advertising is not a contributor—would be more convincing with a reasoned example or evidence, and it needs clearer distinction from the opposing argument. Develop each side with specific explanation and support so the response addresses the issue more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a concluding paragraph giving your opinion. This makes the discussion easy to follow. You also use basic linking expressions such as “However” and “According to their perspective” to signal relationships between ideas. At times, though, the progression within paragraphs is less clear: the first body paragraph moves from market growth to advertising, then to addiction and a proposed ban without fully explaining each link. Some transitions, including “Hence,” feel mechanical, and the conclusion repeats the claim about self-care rather than drawing the discussion together. Use clearer cause-and-effect links and connect your examples directly to each paragraph’s main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “obesity,” “junk food advertising,” “unhealthy lifestyles,” and “diet,” and you attempt more specific expressions such as “leading cause” and “significant change.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes some ideas less natural. For example, “obesity is grown to be a major concern” and “obesity numbers within people” do not express the intended meaning idiomatically; “attributor” is also not the appropriate noun here. Spelling errors such as “obseity” and “excercise” further affect accuracy. Build a bank of natural collocations for discussing causes, influence, and public-health outcomes, and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including the explanation beginning “They believe that obesity is caused by…” and the sentence linking poor diet management with lack of exercise. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction and punctuation sometimes make the relationships between ideas difficult to follow. For instance, the opening sentence uses an incorrect verb construction (“Obesity is grown to be”), while the first paragraph contains a comma splice and an awkwardly capitalised “However” after a semicolon. The final paragraph also has an incomplete construction in “I believe poor self care to be the factor contributing to this issue.” Practise accurate clause boundaries, articles, and verb patterns, then proofread each sentence for a complete and clearly connected structure.

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