Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Obesity is considered as a crucial health problem these days. Some people think that junk food marketing is mainly to blame for this issue and should be restricted.However, other believe that unhealthy food advertising is not the main issue and should not be banned. In my opinion, advertisments play an important role in persauding people to eat more junk food, but people should eat responsibly considering its drawbacks.

In the recent years, the junk food market has become increasingly popular. The social media has a huge contribution in it. The people are eating more junk food that cause them to gain weight quickly because fast food is usually very high in calorie.Eating more calories then their daily need is making people fat. The junk food marketing strategy has persauded people to eat more junk by making attracting ads, by providing cheaper option than healthy food. Fast food market usually hire prominent figures to attract the younger audience. Nowadays, the social media trends has increased their business by attracting the gen z audience.

However, i strongly believe that it totally depends on the people to not be fooled by these marketing strategies.People need to know the downside of eating junk food and be mindful of what they eat. For example, people should not blindly believe the ads but do their own research.Banning the advertisments is not the solution but the healthcare sector should provide people knowledge on healthy and unhealthly eating. I am one of those people who believe that we should not totally cut off junk food from our diet but we should maintain a balance between healthy and unhealthy eating. People should eat according to their daily need and create a balance between eating healthy and enjoying fast food.

In conclusion, junk food marketing can strongly tempt people to consume more unhealthy food, but people should be aware of its drawbacks and conduct their own research before making dietary choices.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and state a clear position: advertising can encourage junk-food consumption, but banning it is not the solution and individuals should make informed choices. The discussion of advertising is relevant, with examples such as social-media trends and celebrities attracting younger audiences. However, the opposing view—that advertising does not contribute significantly to obesity—is not fully explained; the response mainly argues that people should resist advertising. Your points about personal responsibility and education are also repeated rather than developed with specific evidence or a concrete example. To strengthen the response, explain why some people see other causes, such as diet, activity levels or personal choice, as more influential, then support your own position with a more precise example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting contrasting points, and a conclusion that restates your view. The progression from advertising’s influence to personal responsibility is generally easy to follow, and linking words such as “However” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. At times, though, connections are mechanical or unclear. For example, “The social media has a huge contribution in it” does not clearly identify what “it” refers to, and several ideas about balance and responsible eating repeat one another. Improve cohesion by making references explicit and ensuring each paragraph develops a distinct point rather than returning to the same claim.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “obesity,” “marketing strategy,” “prominent figures,” “drawbacks” and “diet,” so the main ideas are communicated. There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “attracting the younger audience.” However, inaccurate word forms, spelling and collocations reduce precision: “persauding,” “advertisments,” “unhealthly,” “cheaper option” and “high in calorie” are examples. Some wording is also vague or repetitive, particularly repeated references to “junk food” and “balance.” Aim to use accurate collocations and vary key terms—for instance, “energy-dense foods” or “food promotion”—while checking spelling and whether nouns are singular or plural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a contrast clause in “but people should eat responsibly” and a reason clause beginning “because fast food is usually…”. Most sentences remain understandable, but some grammatical errors and punctuation problems are noticeable. Examples include “other believe” instead of “others believe,” “The people are eating more junk food that cause them” where the verb does not agree with its subject, and “Eating more calories then their daily need is making people fat,” which has an unclear structure. Missing spaces after full stops and inconsistent capitalisation, as in “i strongly believe,” also affect accuracy. Practise agreement, clause construction and sentence boundaries, then proofread punctuation and capital letters.

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