Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Obesity is one of the major problem that many great countries faces, main causes of obesity in young people is due to eating alot of fast food and doing zero physical exercise, a few number of people belives that main reason for obesity is due to the big and flashy advertisement of fast food or junk food chains and should be banned , however some feels that advertisement of fast food chains has nothing to do with obesity and it should not be banned, in my opinion I belive that junk food advertisement does not contribute any thing in obesity and it should not be banned.

In my opinion, main reason for obesity in young peope is lack of will power, our young generation nor have a strong will neither they can remain firm on their decision, fayas to advertise its product, it should be on us to control our desire to eat unhealthy food, I can say that from my experience, because I was also obese and I loved to eat fast food like pizza and burger, than one day it hit me what I am doing with my life, i can barely walk and I cannot climb stairs, that day I made promise to myself that i would start to eat health, than i started eating healthy and loose approximately 30 kgs, just because of pure will.

However its in human nature that we get attracted to flashy advertisement and in those ads they mention that food will be ready in two or three minutes, so in busy schedule a person cannot get a proper healthy meal, they have to eat the fast food to maintain their busy schedule, and they advertise fast food like its a healthy option for a person which is clearly not, so any advertisement in which the marketing team lies should be banned.

In conclusion I stick with my opinion, that ads are just a distraction, a person should have a control on its will and desire and they should know which food is healthy for them and which is not healthy for them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You discuss both positions and state a consistent view: advertising is not the main cause of obesity and should generally not be banned. Your personal example of losing weight through changes in your own choices supports the argument about individual responsibility. You also acknowledge the opposing view, noting that busy people may be drawn to quick-food adverts and that some promotions present unhealthy food as healthy. However, the discussion is uneven: the case against banning advertising is developed more fully than the reasons people support a ban, and the claim that lack of willpower is the main cause is asserted rather than supported with broader evidence. Develop both sides with clearer reasoning and examples, and distinguish misleading advertising from advertising generally.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two main paragraphs and a conclusion, and the ideas are broadly relevant to each paragraph. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because several points are joined into long, loosely connected sentences. The opening paragraph, for example, moves from causes of obesity to both advertising positions and your opinion without clear sentence boundaries. Linking words such as “however” and “in conclusion” help signal shifts, but the contrast between the two views is not consistently organised, and “In my opinion” is repeated. Use one main point per sentence, make the opposing arguments distinct, and use pronouns and transitions to show precisely how each idea relates to the previous one.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “physical exercise,” “flashy advertisement,” “unhealthy food,” and “busy schedule,” so the main ideas are understandable. There are also attempts at more specific phrasing, such as “maintain their busy schedule” and “marketing team lies.” However, the range is limited and some word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive: “a few number of people,” “pure will,” and repeated use of “fast food” and “advertisement” make expression less natural. Spelling and word-form errors, including “belives” and “peope,” also reduce accuracy. Build a wider set of precise terms for advertising, consumer choice and public health, and check collocations and spelling during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because” and “so,” and the reader can generally understand your position. However, control is inconsistent, particularly in long sentences that combine several independent ideas. There are errors in agreement and verb forms, as in “countries faces” and “I started eating healthy and loose approximately 30 kgs,” as well as article and sentence-boundary problems. The opening is a run-on sentence, while “our young generation nor have a strong will neither they can remain firm” has an unclear grammatical structure. Break long sentences into shorter units, check subject–verb agreement and tense consistency, and practise accurate paired constructions such as “neither…nor.”

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