Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In some communities, obesity is regarded as a severe problem. Some individuals think that advertising of junk food is the major issue and it should be banned. While, others think that marketing of junk food does not lead to the issue of obesity and should not be banned. From my perspective, advertising of junk food is not contributing to make people obese because through seeing it not means that it would generate the curiosity to eat it.

To begin with, through exploring advertisements people get curios about to intake of junk food. They easily get attracted from advertisements and they go in the restaurant to eat junk food or sometimes they started doing orders which highly leads to obesity. For instance, in pakistan, most of the individuals purchase junk food, the reason is that advertisements.

On the other hand, only watching advertisements does not mean that it contribute to eat it, there might be other possible reasons too. They maybe passing from any cafe, while watching the making process of the junk food because of this citizens get attracted easily and start eating it. Some people have habit or they are used to intake of junk food from which they are unable to mitigate this issue and it highly contributing to the issue. Because of this, advertisements should not be prohibited in the societies. For instance, most of the sales of the restaurants of fast food generates from daily customers not by advertisements.

In conclusion, I believe that only advertisements is not the problem which make citizens obese, there might be several other reason which are highly contributing to people obese. Therefore, advertisements should not be banned in any country because it leads to the more benefits rather than disadvantages such as, better options of food.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a clear position: you argue that advertising is not the main cause of obesity and should not be banned. The first body paragraph explains how adverts can attract customers, while the second offers other possible causes, including established eating habits and passing a café. However, the discussion is uneven: the case for banning advertising is brief, and the examples—such as purchases in Pakistan and restaurant sales from regular customers—are asserted rather than supported with clear explanation or evidence. Your conclusion also introduces the claim that advertising brings “more benefits” without explaining what those benefits are. Develop each side more fully and connect examples directly to your reasoning to make the response more complete and convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted by “To begin with” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps readers identify the two positions and your own view. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the first body paragraph moves from curiosity to restaurant visits and orders, then gives a brief example without developing the link. Some connections are also awkward or repetitive, particularly the repeated references to advertisements and obesity. The sentence beginning “They maybe passing from any cafe” is difficult to follow and interrupts the argument. Use clearer topic sentences, organise each paragraph around one main reason, and make links between claims and examples more explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “obesity,” “advertisements,” “junk food,” “customers,” and “prohibited,” so the subject is generally clear. There are also attempts to vary expression, such as “severe problem” and “mitigate this issue.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations sound unnatural, including “get curios about to intake,” “attracted from advertisements,” and “sales … generates from daily customers.” Repetition of “issue,” “advertisements,” and “junk food” also limits flexibility. Choose more natural phrases and use precise vocabulary to distinguish advertising’s influence from other causes, such as availability, habits, or price. This would make your meaning easier to follow and your argument more precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, using structures such as “because,” “while,” and “which,” and the overall meaning can usually be understood. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. For example, “advertising … is not contributing to make people obese” has an incorrect verb pattern, while “only advertisements is not the problem” has a subject–verb agreement error. In “most of the sales … generates,” the verb does not agree with its subject. Some sentences also lack clear grammatical connections, as in “While, others think…” Practise accurate clause formation and agreement, and check each sentence for a complete, correctly linked structure.

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