Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Although, some people think advertisement has nothing to do with obesity problem as it comes from exercising habit and should not be banned, I agree with the view advertisement of unhealthy foods is the main reason behind weight gain and should be banned as they attracks larger audience.

On the one hand, obesity is a health problem which can be overcomed by exercise reducing sedentary activities, so advertisement don't have much affect on it. An individual has full control on what they want to eat and what not to so, watching adds of junk food will not have much effect on their choice of food. However, staying in same place playing games, working without any physical exercise will hindrance the digestive system which may lead to weight gain issues in the long run. For instance, many people these day spends hours first for works and study purpose and remaining on playing game to wind down.

On the other hand, a body is also a reflection of what we eat and unhealthy eating habit will jeopardize ones health. Advertisements are great source of information about the food available on the market. They attracts people by using influencers, actors who are widely known to promote foods and admires buys the products even when they know its unhealthy. In additions, when these unhealthy stuffs are consumed daily a person gets used to having it even if it damages their body. For example, soft copy ramens has got alot of added colors and flavours, however as people watches korean dramas the number of ramens consumers all around has increased drastically.

In conclusion, keeping a body active can decreases the chance of obesity. Nevertheless, the daily consumption of unhealthy food is the major cause of obesity which is brought in light through advertisements. So, promoting unhealthy foods should be banned inorder to prevent it from reaching wider audience.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both views and make your own position clear: you argue that inactivity contributes to obesity, but that advertising unhealthy food is a major cause and should be banned. The two body paragraphs are relevant, and the examples of influencers and instant noodles help illustrate how promotion can shape consumption. This fully covers the task at a solid level, with some elements showing stronger development. However, the opposing view is less fully explained: the claim that individuals control their food choices is asserted, while the link between inactivity and obesity receives only a brief example. The advertising argument would be more convincing if you explained more precisely how repeated exposure affects choices, especially among children, and supported the noodle example with clearer evidence or reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your position, each body paragraph presents one side, and the conclusion restates your view. The signposts “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow. However, some connections are mechanical, and a few references are unclear. For example, “so advertisement don't have much affect on it” leaves “it” referring vaguely to obesity, while “However” shifts from personal choice to inactivity without clearly showing how the ideas relate. The sentence about people spending time on work, study, and games also needs a clearer link to the preceding claim. Use more precise referencing and add transitions that explain relationships, rather than relying mainly on standard paragraph markers.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, including “sedentary activities,” “weight gain,” “influencers,” and “consumption,” and some less common choices such as “jeopardize” show an effort to express ideas precisely. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or awkward, which sometimes makes the meaning less clear. Examples include “advertisement has nothing to do with obesity problem,” “overcomed,” “will hindrance the digestive system,” and “soft copy ramens.” There are also spelling and word-form slips such as “attracks,” “alot,” and “in additions.” Aim for natural combinations such as “advertising contributes to obesity,” “overcome through exercise,” and “instant noodles.” Proofreading these choices and using fewer uncertain expressions would make your vocabulary more reliable and fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “although,” “which,” and “when,” and the overall meaning is generally understandable. Some sentences are controlled, such as “In conclusion, keeping a body active can decreases the chance of obesity,” though this example also shows a verb-form error. Other issues include subject–verb agreement in “advertisement don't” and “They attracts,” and the opening sentence has an awkward clause structure and punctuation after “Although.” Articles and plurals are also inconsistent, as in “an individual has full control on what they want to eat and what not to.” These errors do not usually prevent understanding, but they reduce accuracy. Check agreement, verb forms after modal verbs, and sentence boundaries, while continuing to practise varied complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.