Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the modern world, obesity is considered as a major disease. Some people reckon that the advertising of fast food is most responsible for this disease and it should be stopped. While others feel junk food should not be banned as it does not leads to the obesity. However, advertising fast food has become a common practice nowadays. I tend to shed light on both approaches and share my opinion.

Initially, some people argue that advertising fast food is the main reason behind obesity and it should be restricted. As it encourages adults and young childern to eat junk food. Similarly, they the ingredients use in fast food not only unhealthy, but also contains large amount of fat,. Moreover, chicken is widely used in junk food which contains the most number of fat. To exemplify, an article published by dawn reveals that the promoting fasd food is the major problem behind obesity.

Nevertheless, other individuals advocate that advertising fast food itself does not leads to obesity, but human practices contributes to obesity. They argue that promoting and eating fast food is not wrong if we have control on ourself. Moreover, they argue if we do exercise and encourage physical activities, than there is nothing wrong in eating fast food and should not be banned. To illustrate, a podcast published by BBC reveals that human practices are the major cause of obesity.

In my view, first group of the commentators is more realistic because all ingredients of junk food leads to obesity . Additionally, cold drink are also promoted in advertisements which contains large amount of sugar and fat, also leads to obesity.

In conclusion, I believed that advertising fast food is responisble for obesity. As advertisments promotes unhealthy,and encourage individuals to eat such kind of food. Keeping an eye on these drawbacks fast food advertisements should be banned.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a clear preference for restricting advertising, particularly in “In my view, first group … is more realistic.” The response also includes examples attributed to Dawn and the BBC. However, the discussion is only partly developed: the first side is linked to unhealthy ingredients and advertising, while the opposing side is mainly explained through personal control and exercise. The relationship between advertising and obesity needs clearer reasoning, and the examples are mentioned without specific evidence or explanation of what they demonstrate. Your conclusion repeats your position but does not add much to the argument. Develop each view with a more precise explanation and a relevant, clearly connected example to make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, your opinion, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Initially,” “Nevertheless,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the discussion. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. For example, “As it encourages adults and young children…” is a sentence fragment, and “Similarly, they the ingredients…” disrupts the progression of the first argument. The opinion paragraph also introduces cold drinks without a clear transition from the preceding claim. Use complete sentences, make pronoun references explicit, and connect each supporting point directly to the paragraph’s main idea for smoother progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “obesity,” “advertising,” “ingredients,” “physical activities,” and “promoted,” so the main subject is generally clear. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “advocate” and “illustrate.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors reduce precision: “shed light on both approaches” is awkward in this context, “most number of fat” is unnatural, and “fasd food” and “responisble” are misspelled. Repetition of “fast food,” “junk food,” and “obesity” also makes the writing less flexible. Build a wider set of accurate phrases for discussing advertising, diet, and health, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex structures, including a contrast clause beginning “While others feel…” and conditional forms such as “if we do exercise…”. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. Examples include “it does not leads,” “human practices contributes,” and “ingredients … leads,” where subject–verb agreement or verb forms are incorrect. The opening “As it encourages…” is a fragment, while “they the ingredients use…” has an incomplete structure. There are also problems with articles, plurals, and punctuation, as in “cold drink are” and “fat,.” Practise building complete sentences and check agreement and verb forms before adding more complex clauses.

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