Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Obesity was considered as an enourmous issue in some societies. Many individuals think that fast food become more popular through advertisement and government should ban junk food. On the other hand, few believe that their was no impact of advertisement on the problem of obesity and jusk food should not be banned. I believe that both views are crucial and plays an vital role in everyone health. However, we will discuss about further information in next paragraph.

Initially, nowadays obesity was considered a major concern for citizens. Advertisements play important role in everyone life because some people get influenced easily by them and just for experience they try that food which leads imbalance of hormones in their body. Furthermore, through the attractive ads people get influenced and make a trend of that particular food.

Subsequently, Junk food advertisements does not contribute to the problem of obesity but there are several reasons which leads an individuals to become obese such as poor sleep cycle, not proper diet, physical inactivity and chronic stress. Few medical conditions also make a person obese like PCOS, insulin resistance, hyperthyroidism etc. can contribute to gain weight. Sleep also affect the physical health that why it is said that 7-8 hours of sleep is mandatory to become fully focussed and healthy. For instance, if a person is not doing any kind of physical activity and always sit on one place without doing any movement of their body leads them to get diagnosed with obesity.

In conclusion, I believe that obesity was not caused by advertisements but there are a lot of reasons which affect them such as poor sleep, improper diet,chronic stress etc. Although, it can be controlled by doing some physical activities regularly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You present a view in the conclusion—that obesity has many causes and is not caused by advertising—and give relevant examples of other factors, including inactivity, sleep and medical conditions. However, the task asks you to discuss both views, and the argument that advertising contributes to obesity is only briefly asserted: the claim that people are influenced by attractive ads is not developed with a clear example or explanation. Your opening also says both views are important, which makes your position less clear than the conclusion. To strengthen the response, explain each side in comparable detail and state your own position consistently from the introduction onward.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the paragraphs broadly separate the advertising argument from other causes of obesity. However, progression is limited: the first body paragraph repeats that advertisements influence people without extending the point, while the second lists several causes before moving to sleep and inactivity. Connect each example explicitly to the paragraph’s main claim and organise the ideas in a clearer sequence. Linking words such as “Initially,” “Furthermore,” and “Subsequently” are used, but some feel mechanical or do not show the precise relationship between ideas. The conclusion also repeats the list of causes rather than drawing together the discussion of both views.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “physical inactivity,” “chronic stress,” “insulin resistance,” and “advertisements,” which helps communicate the subject. There is also an attempt to use more formal expressions such as “major concern” and “contribute to the problem.” However, the range is uneven, and inaccurate word choice, collocation and spelling are noticeable. Examples include “enourmous,” “jusk food,” “become popular through advertisement,” and “imbalance of hormones.” Some phrases are vague or unnatural, such as “plays an vital role in everyone health.” Aim for precise collocations and check spelling and word forms; this will make your ideas easier to follow and more appropriately academic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a relative clause in “food which leads imbalance of hormones” and a conditional example beginning “if a person is not doing…”. However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors in agreement, tense, articles and sentence construction occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “obesity was considered as” has an awkward tense and construction, “advertisements does not contribute” has subject–verb disagreement, and “Sleep also affect” lacks agreement. The opening sentence “I believe that both views are crucial and plays…” also combines mismatched subjects and verbs. Practise building accurate sentences first, then check agreement and tense, especially when using longer clauses.

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