Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, several communities face the problem of obesity. Some individuals perspective is that junk food advertisment on large scale is the cause of this problem and should be banned. While several individuals argue on this view.This essay will discuss both view before giving my own opinion. However, I strongly believe that these advertisments are not the root cause of obesity overall.

On one hand, those who want ban on junk food advertisements becasue they believe that thses type of advertisements encurage people to buy these junk food. Moreover, in ads they represents that food like pizza , burgers and sugary drinks are very taste. Most effected ordiance are childrens because they do not know that this typ of food is unhealthy.For instance, in many countries where more junk food ads are show the obesity level of these countries are increasing.

On the other hand, several people believe that ban the junk food ads is not the solution of this and it is also not a main cause of this problem.According to that people's government can play an important role in solving this problem. For instance, governement put high taxes on junk food that can help in reducing its consuption.Further more, governement also allow schools to give information to the students about nutartion. For instance, they teach them how to read the food labels and teach about healthy and balance diet.In addition, if government ban junk food it can affect many business and several individuals can loss their empolymet.

In conlusion, both views have their own merits. However having taken every thing in account, I firmly believe that baning the junk food ads are not the solution of this problem it can cause major problems like unempolyment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and state your position clearly: you argue that advertising is not the root cause and that banning it could contribute to unemployment. The first body paragraph explains why supporters favour a ban, especially the influence of advertising on children, while the second offers alternatives such as taxation and nutrition education. These are relevant points, but some are asserted rather than explained. For example, the claim that countries with more junk-food advertising have rising obesity is not supported with a specific example or explanation, and the possible employment impact of a ban is introduced briefly. Develop each main point by showing how it affects obesity or why it supports your position, and make your own view more nuanced by acknowledging whether advertising can still contribute to the problem.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the discussion. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The opening says the essay will discuss both views, then uses “However” to introduce the writer’s position, which makes the relationship between these ideas awkward. In the second body paragraph, taxation, school education, and employment effects are listed without enough explanation of how they connect. Use linking phrases to show cause, contrast, and consequence, and ensure pronouns such as “this” clearly refer to a specific idea. This would make the progression smoother and the paragraph relationships more precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “obesity,” “advertisements,” “high taxes,” “consumption,” and “nutrition,” so the reader can understand the main discussion. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make the writing less fluent, for example “advertisment,” “audience,” “consuption,” and “unempolyment.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “these type of advertisements” and “very taste.” Aim to learn accurate collocations and word forms alongside topic vocabulary; for instance, say that advertisements “encourage people to purchase” products and that food “tastes appealing.” Proofreading spelling and checking whether each word fits its context would improve clarity and help you express the ideas more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex sentences, including a relative clause in “junk food that can help in reducing its consumption” and a reason introduced with “because.” Meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in sentence construction and agreement occur across the response. For example, “Some individuals perspective is” needs a possessive form and plural agreement, while “they represents” has a subject–verb agreement error. The sentence beginning “While several individuals argue on this view” is incomplete, and several sentences run ideas together without clear punctuation. Practise building complete sentences with accurate subjects and verbs, and use commas and full stops to separate clauses. More reliable control of these patterns will make your arguments easier to follow.

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