Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recant years, there has been a major increase in a number of people who are strugling with obesity. Some people believe that advertising of unhealty food is exacerbating this issue and therefore needs to be banned. Others do not believe that fast food advertising is contributing to this problem and therefore, should not face any restrictions. In this essay I will examine both views and state why I believe that advertisements of unhelalthy products should be banned.

On the one hand, some believe that advertisements do not contribute to the increasing rate of obesity and therefore should not be restricted. They stem from the believe that advertisements do no influence the way we act and that the obesity issue should be enhanced by other measures than the bann of unhealty food propagations. Furthermore, they believe that many people buying fast food are not obese and it would not be fair for them if the advertisements were forbidden, as they may enjoy eating junk food. In addition to this, if food companies could not advert their products it may lead to the loss of customers, therefore the dercease of the amount of products sold. This would have a significant impact on their economic system.

On the other hand, I strongly agree with the idea that propagation of junk food strongly contributes to the increasing obesity rate. Advertisements influence the way we live and sometimes can lead to the decrease quality of our lifes. This is mainly because if the the junk food is propagated as a beneficial factor to us, many people are influenced by it and proceed to eat less healthily. For instance, advertisements of coca-cola zero say that this drink is overall beneficial to our healt, which leads to many people buying it, exarcerbating their health, as the drink is not healthy. Therefore, I believe that authorities should impose restrictions on unhlethy products advertisements, as it may significantly improve the high obesity rate we are currently facing.

To conclude, I believe that the propagations of junk food shouls be banned as I it coult mitigate the current obesity issue.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and state a clear position: you explain why some oppose restrictions, then argue that junk-food advertising should be banned. The response is relevant, and the example of Coca-Cola Zero gives your argument some support. However, the two sides are not developed equally. The case against a ban focuses mainly on consumer choice and possible harm to companies, while the link between advertising and obesity is asserted rather than demonstrated. The example also claims the drink is presented as beneficial and harms health, but does not explain how this specifically affects obesity. To strengthen the response, develop the reasoning on both sides and use a more direct example or evidence connecting advertising, consumption and weight gain.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the opposing views, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude” makes the progression easy to follow. This meets the lower-band expectations securely, and the paragraphing supports the discussion. Some links between ideas are less smooth, however: the paragraph opposing a ban moves from influence on behaviour to fairness for consumers and then to companies’ sales without clearly showing how these points connect. Repeated use of “therefore” also makes some transitions feel mechanical. Use clearer cause-and-effect links and refer back to the central question of obesity when introducing each supporting point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “obesity rate,” “restrictions,” “influence,” and “economic system,” and the reader can generally understand your meaning. However, inaccurate word choice, collocation and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the expression awkward. Examples include “the obesity issue should be enhanced,” “food propagations,” “advert their products,” and “exarcerbating their health.” There are also repeated misspellings such as “unhealty” and “shouls.” These errors limit precision and control, even though the main ideas remain understandable. Build a reliable set of natural phrases for this topic, check spelling carefully, and choose words that express the intended relationship—for example, “worsened” rather than “enhanced” when describing a problem.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if food companies could not advert their products it may lead…” and clauses beginning with “as” and “which.” Most sentences communicate the intended point, but some grammatical errors recur and occasionally make relationships unclear. For example, “if the the junk food is propagated” has a duplicated article, while “it may lead to the loss of customers, therefore the dercease…” joins clauses without a suitable grammatical connection. In “I believe that the propagations … shouls be banned as I it coult mitigate,” the clause structure is faulty. Practise accurate conditional forms, articles, and sentence boundaries, and proofread for duplicated or missing words.

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