Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Obesity is considered as one of the major issues in some societies. Many people believe that junk food advertising plays a major role in this and hence, should be banned. But others argue that advertisement of junk food has no contribution in this problem and should not be boycotted. I believe, the latter one is true because obesity is caused by many factors.

On the one hand, people believe that consumption of junk food is because of its branding. This is because regular promotion of unhealthy food influences masses and makes it difficult for them to follow a healthy diet. As a result, it affects the overall health of people and eventually leads to obesity; hence, making it a major issue in the contemporary society.

On the other hand, many people argue that promoting junk food does not have a major role in the growing issue of obesity. This is because obesity is caused by several factors, primarily due to sedentary lifestyle and unhealthy diet. These factors play a much bigger role than advertisement of junk food. Moreover, branding is a part of marketing and we cannot blame them for the poor decisions of people. For example, people in my country suffer from overweight because of poor diet choices.

In conclusion, although advertisement can promote unhealthy lifestyle, I believe, people are accountable for their own diet and sedentary lifestyle.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a clear preference for the view that advertising is not the main cause: “I believe, the latter one is true.” The response also gives relevant reasons, including sedentary lifestyles and personal diet choices. However, the discussion is brief and some ideas are asserted rather than developed. The argument that advertising influences people is explained in general terms, while the example about people in your country does not show how their choices relate to advertising or provide specific support. The conclusion repeats your position but does not add much synthesis. The response is 21 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to explain and support both sides. Develop each view with a clearer example and explain why your preferred factors outweigh advertising.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. The contrast between “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” helps readers follow the discussion, and the ideas generally progress from advertising’s influence to other causes of obesity. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent overall arrangement and shows some stronger control through clear paragraphing. To make the progression more consistently smooth, avoid relying on repeated “This is because” explanations and make links between claims more explicit. For example, the final example about poor diet choices could be connected directly to the claim that individual behaviour matters more than advertising. The conclusion could also briefly bring together the two sides rather than mainly restating your opinion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “sedentary lifestyle,” “unhealthy diet,” “branding,” and “contemporary society,” so the main ideas are communicated clearly. There are also attempts to express cause and effect, such as “eventually leads to obesity.” However, the range is limited in places, and some choices are imprecise or unnatural: “advertisement of junk food,” “has no contribution in this problem,” and “boycotted” do not express the intended meaning as naturally as “junk-food advertising,” “does not contribute to the problem,” and “banned.” “Branding” is also used where “advertising” or “marketing” would be more precise. Aim for accurate collocations and vary repeated terms such as “people” and “obesity.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentences, including a cause-and-effect structure in “This is because regular promotion … influences masses and makes it difficult for them to follow a healthy diet.” Most sentences are understandable, and errors rarely prevent the reader from following your argument. Some grammatical inaccuracies remain, however. In “Obesity is considered as one of the major issues,” the passive construction should be “considered one of”; “I believe, the latter one is true” has unnecessary punctuation and an awkward clause structure; and “although advertisement can promote …, I believe, people are accountable” again misplaces commas. The fragment-like “hence, making it a major issue” would be clearer as a complete clause. Practise accurate article use and punctuation around introductory and subordinate clauses while continuing to use varied sentence forms.

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