Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Obesity is one of the most significant problem in many societies. A large number of people argue whether it is a consequence of advertising junk food or are there other factors that add enormously to this fuel. Although it is true that the factors such as medications or lack of physical activity can cause obesity, I believe that advertising junk food is largely to blame as it encourages people to eat unhealthy food.

Many other truths add the issue of obesity. For instance, many people take medications for some diseases which cause side effect on their bodies and can cause obesity. Their fat body is not due to over-eating but rather a victom of the drugs they consume. Similarly, a lot of people do not eat junk food to a large extent but still gain weight. This is caused by lack of physical labour as a large number of people nowadays spend their time on screens. They overlook exercise and other physical activities that makes them over-weight.

Another major factor which exacerbates this situation is emotional eating. Many people tend to eat not because they are hungry or they enjoy the food, rather it becomes a form of escape from various psychological problems. This is a psychological issue which needs proper therapy however the patients of such issues often remains unaware.

The reason I believe that the contribution of advertising companies is still very high is due to their influence, on various social platforms and lives of the public. We are aware that a very large crowd of masses is available online. These individuals are exposed to various sort of advertisment which potrays junk food as a high class food. many celebrities and admired public figures are presented as the fans of these unhealthy foods which motivates people to eat them. These advertisment companies makes eating junk food a trend which leads youngsters to eat more of this unhealthy food in order to look cool.

In conclusion, I would say that the contribution of factors like unhealthy habits and medical issues can cause obesity however advertisment agencies are largely to blame for glorifying eating junk food.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views by discussing factors other than advertising—medication, inactivity and emotional eating—and then explain why you consider advertising a major cause. Your position is clear in the introduction and conclusion. The discussion is relevant, but the opposing view is developed more as a list of possible causes than as an explanation of why advertising should not be banned. Some claims, such as celebrities making junk food seem high-class, would benefit from a specific example or clearer explanation of how this leads to obesity. To strengthen the response, engage directly with the question of banning advertising and develop the reasoning on both sides more evenly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, paragraphs on other causes and advertising, and a conclusion. Sequencing is generally easy to follow, and signposts such as “For instance,” “Similarly,” and “In conclusion” help guide the reader. However, the paragraph beginning “Many other truths add the issue” groups several distinct causes together, while emotional eating receives a separate paragraph without a strong link to the preceding discussion. Some transitions are mechanical, and references such as “this situation” and “these individuals” could be more precise. Organise the causes into a clearer progression and use linking phrases to show how each point relates to the debate about banning advertisements.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “physical activity,” “emotional eating,” “psychological problems,” “social platforms,” and “glorifying.” These choices make the main ideas clear, and you attempt less common expressions such as “exacerbates this situation.” Some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, however: “many other truths add the issue,” “a large crowd of masses,” and “high class food” do not express the intended ideas naturally. Spelling errors such as “victom,” “advertisment,” and “potrays” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, conventional collocations and check spelling; for example, use “other factors contribute to obesity” rather than “other truths add the issue.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex forms, including subordinate clauses with “Although” and “which,” and most sentences remain understandable. Some grammatical errors persist in agreement, articles, and sentence construction. For example, “one of the most significant problem” needs a plural noun, and “physical activities that makes them” has a subject–verb agreement error. In “many people tend to eat not because they are hungry or they enjoy the food, rather it becomes,” the contrast is not joined grammatically; a structure such as “but because it becomes” would be clearer. There are also errors in “these advertisement companies makes.” Review agreement and practise joining contrasting clauses accurately to improve control across your complex sentences.

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