Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Junk food is always thought that it is the reason for health problems and obesity. I would atgue that, Bad habits are the first cause of overweighting and they are icluding junk food.

Imagine that, A person who does not eat unhealthy food but he is lazy and has very bad habits that lead to healt problem and getting fat like smoling or drink tea with much sugar. Futhermore, A person who eats junk food weekly as a free meal but he is so discipline all days except one day so he will not get fat anf that is the point.

Eating junk food is not the main problem but the bad habits are.

I knew one, he decided in previous period to gain more weight so he ate so mich at a late time and slept more time and obsolutely did not practice any sport, so he gain 50 kg just in 3 months. Recently he wants to lise the weight so he do not eat junk food so much but he is still lazy so we all know the results that he can not lose weight.

Someone also gained 20 kg, she lose her wieght in no time but she ate junk food once a week with practicing simple sport most of her time.

In conclusion, Junk food is too delicious but we should not eat it every day, I think we all should replace bad habits that harm our health with good habits that are very usefull for our bodies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You give a clear central view that habits, rather than junk food alone, are the main cause of obesity, and your examples about people changing their weight support this position. However, the response does not adequately discuss both views in the question: it focuses on personal habits and does not explain why some people believe advertising contributes to obesity or why others think it does not. The issue of whether advertising should be banned is also not addressed directly. The examples are relevant to diet and exercise, but they are anecdotal and do not establish how advertising affects choices. To strengthen the response, present both arguments explicitly, then explain your own position on a ban with a developed reason or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable overall shape: it introduces a view, gives examples, and ends with a conclusion. The examples are generally connected to your point about habits, and linking expressions such as “Furthermore” and “In conclusion” help signal movement between ideas. However, there is no clear paragraph structure, and the discussion does not progress through the two sides of the task. Several ideas are placed together without explaining their relationship, while “that is the point” and “we all know the results” rely on unclear references. Organise the essay into an introduction, separate paragraphs for each view, and a conclusion. Use linking phrases to show contrast and cause, and make each paragraph’s main point explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use basic vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “obesity,” “unhealthy food,” “bad habits,” and “practice sport,” so the main message is usually understandable. There are also attempts to express cause and effect through phrases such as “lead to” and “harm our health.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, spelling, and word-form errors make the writing less clear, including “overweighting,” “smoling,” “lise,” and “usefull.” Some expressions are unnatural, such as “as a free meal” and “in previous period.” Aim for accurate topic-specific language and check spelling carefully. More precise phrases such as “sedentary lifestyle,” “advertising influences food choices,” and “restrict advertisements” would help you discuss the actual question.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a conditional example beginning “A person who does not eat unhealthy food but he is lazy” and clauses explaining how habits affect health. This shows some willingness to vary sentence structure, and the overall meaning can generally be followed. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and punctuation occur frequently. For example, “lead to healt problem” lacks an article and plural agreement, while “he gain 50 kg” and “she lose her wieght” use incorrect verb forms. Commas and capital letters are also used inconsistently. Build accuracy by writing shorter complete sentences first, then joining them with correctly formed clauses and checking subject–verb agreement and past-tense verbs.

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