Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Obesity has been the major problem between almost all the socities few people believe that fast food promotion is the main reason for this problem and should be made illegal. However, others feel that junk food advertising alone does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned. In my opinion junk food is the one of main problems but there are several other factors as well.

Junk food advertisment and promtion has made it popular among the all age groups meanwhile especially among children and yound adults. As one know junk food itself mean which is something junk or umhealthy as it is maybe deep fried in oil or cooked with alot of calories and fats which results in the increase fat deposits in the body hence cause obesity. Some people believe that eating junk food is the main cause of different diseases such as cardiovascular problems, Daibeties, Blood pressure, increase cholestrol levels, increase cortisol and uric acid levels. Junk food is a kind of addiction because of how delicious it taste and excess of anything is not good so is junk food thus results in obesity.

Whereas there are several other factors as well for obesity other than junk food and some of which are inactive lifestyle, eating at late hours, unable to control binge eating, smoking and alcohol, several other disease such as thyroid and daibetes. So advertising junk food does not contribute mainly as people are aware of junk food already as it has become the part of our society and banning it from advertisment wont make much difference instead it may result in the bad impact on some business and people may lose their jobs and there could be increase number of unemployment.

In concolusion eating junk is part of our life but eating too much junk is bad for our health not just because it result in obesity as too much of anything is dangerous so there should be awarness campaign to educate people about health life style choices and make a balance between healthy food and junk foodinstead of banning advertisment and there should be more strict checks on the restaurants and take-aways to use upto the mark ingredients and insure people health.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and give a clear personal position: advertising may contribute, but other causes also matter, so education and regulation are preferable to a ban. The discussion of alternative factors—such as inactivity, binge eating and health conditions—helps answer the question, and the proposed awareness campaigns offer a relevant conclusion. However, the case for banning advertising is less fully developed: you say promotion makes junk food popular, especially among young people, but do not explain in detail how this supports a ban or provide a specific example. The opposing view is more developed through possible effects on businesses and employment, though this too would benefit from evidence or explanation. Develop both sides more evenly and make the link between each reason and your position explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate discussion of the two views and a conclusion. This gives the reader an overall sense of direction. Some links between ideas, however, are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Whereas there are several other factors” begins a paragraph without a complete contrast structure, and “meanwhile especially” does not clearly show the relationship between advertising and the groups affected. The second body paragraph also moves quickly from other causes of obesity to business consequences without a clear transition. Use topic sentences to establish each paragraph’s main point, then group supporting reasons logically and use linking expressions only where they clarify the relationship.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “advertising,” “obesity,” “binge eating,” “cardiovascular problems” and “unemployment,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “fat deposits” and “awareness campaign.” However, spelling errors and imprecise or unnatural combinations are noticeable, including “socities,” “promtion,” “advertisment,” “increase fat deposits” and “make a balance.” Some wording is repetitive, particularly repeated references to junk food and obesity, and “junk” is too informal in places. Aim for accurate spelling and more natural collocations, and vary references with terms such as “high-calorie foods” or “processed food” where appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including cause-and-effect structures with “which results in” and a contrast introduced by “Whereas.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. For example, “Junk food is a kind of addiction because of how delicious it taste” has an agreement error and an awkward clause structure; “there could be increase number of unemployment” also has problems with articles and noun forms. The long final sentence joins several recommendations without clear punctuation, while “there should be awareness campaign” needs an article. Practise building shorter, complete sentences first, then combine ideas using accurate subordinate clauses and punctuation.

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