Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The line graph below shows past and current overweight rates, as well as a projected future overweight rate in nine selected countries.

Summarise the infonnation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Past and projected future overweight rates in selected OECD countries

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The line graph illustrates comperison of nine OECD countries about past, Now and for upcoming projected overweight rates.

Overall, all the countries of OECD increase the trends of overweight.United state dramtically increasd more.Korea most least countries which is lower rate of highweight rate.

From 1970 to 1980 only US in the list with under 50% and one decline in graph approxemately in mid of 2 years but then steady increased till 2020 at more then 70%. Austria spain and england from near 1980 a increased in trend from nearly 70% 60% and more then 60% respectvely.

On otherhand Canada, france korea italy and Australia follow same trends but after 1980. Austrial start from more then 30% and end more the 60%.France start from1990 exct from 30% then end with just above 40%. Korea mor

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the broad upward pattern and note that the USA rises to above 70%, while Korea remains comparatively low. However, the overview is inaccurate in saying that every country increases throughout: several series fluctuate, and the USA initially falls. Some comparisons are also misreported; for example, Austria, Spain and England did not begin near 70%, 60% and above 60% respectively. The account ends abruptly at “Korea mor” and gives little coverage of several countries or the main differences between them. The response is also 16 words below the required minimum. To improve, provide a complete overview, select a few accurate comparisons across the highest and lowest rates, and support them with approximate figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, an overview and two paragraphs attempting to describe the data. This gives the response some organisation, and phrases such as “Overall” and “On otherhand” show an effort to connect ideas. However, progression is difficult to follow because countries are grouped without a clear organising principle, and the final sentence is unfinished. References such as “same trends” are unclear, while the time periods shift between sentences without explanation. Organise the details into meaningful groups—for example, the highest and lowest rates—and use clear linking phrases to show comparisons and changes over time. Complete each paragraph so the reader can follow the account.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant task vocabulary, including “line graph,” “rates,” “decline” and “increased,” so the topic is recognisable. However, the range is basic and several inaccurate or misspelled expressions make the meaning harder to understand, such as “highweight rate,” “comperison” and “dramtically increasd.” Phrases including “increase the trends” and “same trends” are also imprecise for describing data. Aim for accurate, conventional collocations such as “the proportion rose” or “the rate fluctuated,” and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help distinguish steady growth, a slight fall and a plateau rather than describing most movements in the same general terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a few different sentence forms, including an overview and sentences with time clauses, but control is weak and errors frequently affect clarity. For example, “all the countries of OECD increase the trends” lacks a clear grammatical structure, and “Austria spain and england … a increased” has problems with articles, verb form and sentence construction. There are also missing or misplaced punctuation marks, as in “overweight.United” and “from1990.” Most sentences rely on simple patterns, while attempts to combine several details become difficult to follow. Practise forming complete subject–verb sentences in the past tense, and use a consistent structure such as “The rate in X rose from … to …” before attempting longer comparisons.

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