Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The line graph below shows past and current overweight rates, as well as a projected future overweight rate in nine selected countries.

Summarise the infonnation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Past and projected future overweight rates in selected OECD countries

Student answer (Band 4.5)

here we have graph shows past and current overweight rates, as well as a projected future overweight rate in nine selected countries.

so here we have data for year or year and that data from 1970 to 2020 so it is so imformative

here all the courtins having the same trend in a begging there is not much high but after the time it gowing.

here for USA follow this trend also canada england this two are also the part of this formate and rest other are having diffrent approch like for austria it is gwoing but not as this are and the gwoing tread is not so much as this three and place like italy,spain,korea,france there are come leter and also we can see a drop in there tread so they also have there own pattern which there are creting with there data for proportion overweight

so the ranking is USA came first and also the rate for proporion overweight is higer then others then england has the second ranking then the australia and then the spain and canada this two are prette much same in a data.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the subject and time span, and you attempt to compare countries by ranking them. However, the response reports only a few broad patterns and does not give a clear, accurate overview of the main features. The claim that all countries follow the same trend is too general: several rise overall, but their starting points and paths differ. Your ranking also omits the projected endpoint and is incomplete; the USA is highest, but England and Australia are close, while Spain and Canada finish at roughly similar levels. The suggestion of a drop in several countries is not supported as a general trend. Select key start-to-end changes and give approximate figures to make the summary more informative.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to move from an introduction to general trends and then to a ranking, so the reader can recognise the intended structure. However, ideas are not arranged coherently enough: the second paragraph repeats that the graph contains data, while the later discussion shifts between groups of countries without a clear organising principle. Phrases such as “this two” and “rest other” make the references difficult to follow, and the long final trend paragraph combines several comparisons in one sentence. Use distinct paragraphs for the overview and selected comparisons, and connect each country group with clear references and linking expressions. This would give the information a more logical progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “trend,” “ranking,” “rate,” and “proportion overweight,” which shows an attempt to describe the graph rather than rely entirely on everyday language. However, the range is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling errors make several phrases difficult to understand, such as “imformative,” “gwoing,” and “proporion.” Some word choices are also imprecise: “approch” and “formate” do not clearly describe differences between data series, while “drop” is used without identifying a specific decline. Build a more accurate set of graph-description terms and check spelling carefully. Alternatives such as “increase,” “remain stable,” and “projected figure” would help you report patterns precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to form longer sentences and make comparisons, for example, “here for USA follow this trend also canada england this two…” However, sentence structures are very limited and frequently incomplete, so relationships between ideas are often unclear. The opening “here we have graph shows” lacks a grammatical connection between the subject and verb, and “all the courtins having” has no finite verb. Articles, agreement, and punctuation are also inconsistently controlled, as in “the australia and then the spain.” Most statements would be clearer as complete sentences with a subject and verb, such as “The USA follows this trend, as do Canada and England.” Practise accurate simple sentences before adding longer comparisons.

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