Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The line graph below shows past and current overweight rates, as well as a projected future overweight rate in nine selected countries.

Summarise the infonnation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Past and projected future overweight rates in selected OECD countries

Student answer (Band 4.0)

This graph show the overgeight person of different countries.firsly,in USA large amount of people are overweighted .It was started from 43 percent in 1970 and finally reached to 74 percent in 2020 .secondly in england the rate of overweight people also increased .moreover england the rate of overgeight people also increased

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response identifies the graph’s subject and gives one relevant trend: the US rate rises to about 74% by 2020. However, it misreports the starting point and year: the chart shows about 45% in 1972, not 43% in 1970. England is mentioned, but no clear figures or complete trend are provided, and the final clause repeats the same point. There is no overview comparing the countries or identifying the highest and lowest rates, and most of the nine countries are omitted. The response is also substantially below the required 150 words, leaving the task only minimally addressed. To improve, summarise the overall pattern, select several key comparisons, and support them with accurate data.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic sequence, signalled by “firstly” and “secondly,” and the reader can identify the US and England as the topics. However, the response has no paragraphing or clear overall progression from an introduction to an overview and then supporting details. The repeated statement about England (“the rate … also increased”) adds no new information, while “moreover” does not introduce a distinct point. The ideas therefore feel incomplete and repetitive rather than connected into a summary. Organise the response into a short introduction, an overview of the main patterns, and a detail section comparing selected countries; use linking expressions only when they show a genuine relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “rate,” “percent,” “increased,” and “reached,” so the basic topic is recognisable. However, vocabulary is repetitive and several choices or spellings are inaccurate: “overgeight” appears twice, “overweighted” is not the natural term for people, and “large amount of people” is an awkward collocation. “Different countries” is also too general when naming countries and describing their rates would be more precise. Expand the vocabulary for describing trends and comparisons, such as “proportion,” “rose steadily,” “remained relatively low,” and “was higher than.” Check spelling carefully and use natural phrases such as “the proportion of people who were overweight.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response communicates a few simple ideas, but grammatical control is weakened by errors in sentence formation, agreement, and punctuation. For example, “This graph show” needs a singular verb, and “It was started from 43 percent” uses an unsuitable passive construction for describing a data trend. The sentence beginning “moreover england the rate” is incomplete because it lacks a clear grammatical structure. Capitalisation and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent, with several ideas joined by full stops without appropriate spacing. Most clauses follow a basic subject–verb pattern, so there is little evidence of a wider range of structures. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine comparisons using structures such as “while” and “whereas.”

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