Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

To make improvement in people's live should be the primary aim of sciene. I strongly agree with statement because the revolution in healthcare and the quality of life of people can only be possible with the advancement of science and technology.

To begin with, science has changed the direction of healthcare. In the past, mortality rate of people with common illness was quiet high. The overall life expectancy was very low. The development of vacccines and medicines carried biggest change in medical field. For instance, the rate of newborn and post partem deaths have become significantly low with advanced vaccines and preventable care. Furthermore, with the help of new diagnostic machines, even rare diseases can be detected at an early which was not possible before the advancement of science.

The quality of life of people has also drastically improved. The mobile phone has changed peope's live. You can connect to any part of the world at one click. Similarly, with the help of machines, the tasks which took a lot of hardwork and time can be done in minutes.Morever, science has played a huge role in the transport system. For example, people had to travel weeks just to move between the cities, but with advancement of science and technology, long distances can be covered in just hours with help of airplanes and electric trains. All of these advancements occured because the main goal of science was to bring betterment in people's lives.

In conclusion, all the advancements in healthcare, transport or even in everyday life of people was made possible because of science so the main priority ofscience and technology should always be for the benefit of people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear from the opening: you strongly agree that science should aim to improve people’s lives, and the conclusion reinforces this view. You address the prompt with relevant examples from healthcare, communication, transport and everyday tasks. The discussion of vaccines, diagnostic machines and faster travel gives the argument useful support. To make the response more fully developed, explain the examples’ significance rather than relying on broad claims—for instance, clarify how improved diagnosis or transport changes people’s lives. The statement that these advances occurred because science’s “main goal” was human betterment is also asserted rather than demonstrated. A brief acknowledgement of other possible aims of science, followed by a reason your priority should remain human welfare, would add depth while preserving your clear position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear overall progression: an introduction states your position, two body paragraphs develop healthcare and quality-of-life benefits, and a conclusion restates the argument. Topic sentences such as “science has changed the direction of healthcare” help readers follow the main points, while “Furthermore,” “Similarly” and “For example” signal additions and illustrations. The organisation is logical, but some transitions feel mechanical, and the second body paragraph moves quickly from mobile phones to machinery and transport. Grouping these examples more deliberately, or explaining the link between them, would make the progression smoother. Check referencing and sentence boundaries too: “which was not possible before” could identify more clearly what was impossible, and the missing space in “minutes.Morever” interrupts the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “life expectancy,” “vaccines,” “diagnostic machines,” “transport system” and “advancement of science and technology.” These terms make the subject clear, and the examples are generally understandable. There are, however, some spelling and word-choice errors, including “sciene,” “vacccines,” “peope's” and “occurred,” as well as awkward expressions such as “carried biggest change” and “at an early.” Repetition of “science,” “advancement” and “people’s lives” also limits flexibility. Aim for more precise collocations and vary repeated wording—for example, use “brought about major changes” and “detected at an early stage.” Proofreading spelling and apostrophes would improve accuracy without requiring more complicated vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “with the help of” and “which.” This allows you to explain causes and give examples, and the main meaning is usually clear. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, agreement, verb forms and sentence construction. For example, “the rate of newborn and post partem deaths have become” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “can be detected at an early” is incomplete and needs a noun such as “stage.” In the conclusion, “all the advancements … was made possible” also has an agreement error. Review these patterns and punctuate sentence boundaries carefully; the run-on spacing in “minutes.Morever” should be corrected. More consistently accurate complex sentences would strengthen control.

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