Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In modern society, there is an ongoing devate whether aim of science. Many aruge that the most important aim of science should be to improve individuals lives. I compeletely agree with the satement.

There are two main reasons why i agree with this idea that aim of science should be to develop people's lives. Perhaps the primary reason why I believe that aim of science should be advantage individuals lives because it particularly offer many better things in human life. In other words, a recent study shows that about 80% of people believe that aim of science are very necessary for human lifes such as boosting their knowledge and adapting creativity. Another significant reason is that aim of science potentially leads to significant improvements in individuals well-being. These good things can include communication such as connecting to other people.

Furthermore, another compelling reasonis that why I agree with this view. The main reason is that aim of science is beneficial approach because it brings possitive changes to human daily lives. For example, a least survey by "The Daily Star" reavels that majority of people argue that aim of science is important to human lifes because it provides a wide rage of social resouces. Moreover, aim of science is an important factor that should be taken into consideration, as it can also impact individuals work-life balance.

In conclusion, considering the factors discuss above, i believe that aim of science should be benefit people's lifes because it improves their quality of lives, which has the major impact on their daily life.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource4.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.0
Overall4.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The student attempts to address the prompt by stating an agreement with the idea that the primary aim of science should be to improve people's lives. However, the development of ideas is heavily hindered by severe repetitiveness and lack of substantive elaboration. Phrases like 'aim of science' are repeated constantly throughout the essay without being built upon meaningfully. While a clear position is presented at the beginning, the supporting arguments rely on vague assertions and unconvincing generalisations, such as claiming a study shows 80% of people believe in this aim. The response touches upon relevant concepts like well-being and work-life balance, but these points remain under-developed and formulaic. Consequently, the performance aligns best with the Band 5 descriptors, as the task is addressed only partially due to limited and repetitive idea development.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, which provides a basic structural framework, but the logical progression is weak. Cohesive devices are misused, overused, or awkwardly introduced, as seen in repetitive sentence openings like 'Furthermore, another compelling reasonis that why I agree...'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal flow of ideas is disjointed because sentences often restate the exact same concept using different words rather than advancing the argument. Referencing is also problematic, making the overall structure feel mechanical and repetitive. This level of organisation and cohesion firmly corresponds to Band 5, where there is some overall structure, but clear progression is lacking and cohesive devices are inadequate or inaccurate.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is very basic, repetitive, and restricted. Throughout the essay, the writer continually recycles fundamental phrases such as 'aim of science', 'improve people's lives', and 'individuals lives'. There are numerous spelling and word-choice errors, including 'devate' instead of debate, 'aruge' instead of argue, 'compeletely', 'satement', 'advantage' used as a verb, 'possitive', 'least survey' instead of latest survey, and 'reavels'. Less common lexical items are attempted unsuccessfully, and collocation errors are frequent. The range of vocabulary is minimally adequate to express simple ideas, but noticeable errors and severe repetitiveness cause difficulty and strain for the reader, placing this performance at Band 4.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most complex sentence attempts are faulty or grammatically ungrammatical, such as 'Furthermore, another compelling reasonis that why I agree with this view.' Punctuation and article usage are frequently flawed, and sentence boundaries are sometimes obscured by awkward phrasing. Errors occur with high frequency across simple and complex forms alike, often distorting meaning and causing significant difficulty for the reader. There are persistent mistakes in verb forms, prepositions, and subject-verb agreement throughout the text. These persistent and frequent errors across a narrow range of structures place the grammar score at Band 4.

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