Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The most significant target of science should be the bettterment of the lives of individuals.I strongly agree with this statement.

First of all,through science several advancements have been made in the health sector.A good example is treatment,citing example from the Keiyo community which is a sub-tribe of the Kalenjin tribe in Kenya,before the improvement of science a severe headache was treated with surgery with no anaesthesia which hapenned to be painful and traumatising,but with science we have witnessed advancement and the development of pain free surgeries which has brought about better healing,high quality life and even wonderful treatment outcomes.

They say the world is a global village who are one people.Now people from different continents,culture,race and tribes can now interact,learn from one another and even work towards providing solutions together.This has been made posssible through scientific innovations in social media.Moreover some online platforms like facebook and instagram can be monetized,in that content creators can influence for brands and earn money hence making their lives and the life of the community better.

On the other hand,some people argue that science has brought about negative impacts other than improving people's lives.One such example is the moral decay that technology has brought to the society.Child trafficking is hapenning through social meida,selling of pornography materials and even online scamming.

In conclusion,we are experiencing immense benefits and better lives through science.More resources should be put in place to cater for further research in science.Alternatively,science has it's fair share of disavantages and the society should learn how to moderate and deal with the negative impacts it has brought about.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the opening: you strongly agree that science should aim to improve people’s lives, and the conclusion reinforces this view while acknowledging drawbacks. The health example about painful surgery becoming pain-free is relevant and gives your argument a concrete basis. You also address a counterargument through online harms, so the response covers the main parts of the prompt. However, some points are less fully developed: the social-media paragraph moves quickly from communication to monetisation without explaining how these benefits demonstrate science’s most important aim. The negative impacts are listed rather than weighed against the benefits. To strengthen the response, explain each example’s significance and make clearer why improving lives should take priority over other scientific aims.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two supporting paragraphs, a counterargument, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “First of all,” “Moreover,” and “On the other hand” help readers follow the main stages, and the conclusion returns to the central issue. Some connections are nevertheless mechanical, and the progression within paragraphs is occasionally unclear. For example, the social-media paragraph shifts from cross-cultural interaction to earning money without a clear link between these ideas. The opening of the counterargument, “They say the world is a global village,” also does not clearly introduce the point that follows. Use more precise transitions and develop one connected line of reasoning in each paragraph; clearer referencing would also help readers track ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic-related vocabulary, including “advancements,” “innovations,” “content creators,” and “research,” and several choices help convey specific examples. There are also attempts at less common or formal expressions, such as “moral decay” and “treatment outcomes.” However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “the bettterment,” “pain free surgeries,” and “influence for brands.” Spelling errors such as “hapenned,” “posssible,” and “disavantages” also reduce precision. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points, but they limit the naturalness and control of the vocabulary. Aim for accurate, conventional collocations and proofread spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a sentence beginning “Although” in the final paragraph and a longer example introduced with “citing example.” This shows some range, and the overall meaning is generally understandable. However, sentence boundaries and punctuation are not consistently controlled: the opening joins two sentences without a space, while the long surgery example runs on and is difficult to follow. There are also errors in articles, agreement, and sentence construction, as in “the world is a global village who are one people” and “some online platforms … can be monetized, in that content creators can influence for brands.” Use shorter, complete sentences where needed, and check clause structure, articles, and agreement to make complex ideas clearer.

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