Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Our generation is going through a lot of environmental issues, and these are due to the loss of excessive deforestation which has led to environmental imbalance. There are certain species are black buck, single horned Rhinoceros, sparrow , crow which are on the verge of extinction due to human activities.it is right said by Mahatama Gandhi "There is enough for everyone's need but not for greed."
In my opinion, the serious threat to environment is not only because of loss of particular species of plant and animal but also mainly due to human activities. Humans think that nature has given us everything free of cost and not using the resources judiciously. Excessive industralisation,disposing off waste into rivers without treating it has disturbed aquatic life as well. Rapid advancement in technology without any doubt has led to economic growth of countries but at the cost of environment.Industries are disposing off smoke in the environment has added to higher level of pollution.moreover,
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 160 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you mention both views—the loss of species and other environmental problems—the discussion is underdeveloped. You do not fully explore the arguments for the loss of species, and the second paragraph shifts focus to general human activities without providing a balanced comparison or a clear, sustained opinion. To improve, you must expand each body paragraph with specific examples and logical reasoning to ensure all parts of the prompt are addressed thoroughly.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks a clear structure. The introduction is abrupt, and the second paragraph ends mid-sentence with 'moreover,', indicating an incomplete thought and a lack of logical progression. While there is some attempt at paragraphing, the transition between ideas is weak. Cohesive devices are minimal, and the lack of a conclusion further disrupts the flow of the argument. To achieve a higher score, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, use linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in contrast') to connect ideas, and always include a concluding paragraph that summarizes your main points and restates your position.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for basic communication but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You use some relevant terms like 'extinction', 'environmental imbalance', and 'judiciously', but there are also errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'loss of excessive deforestation' and 'disposing off'. The repetition of basic structures limits your ability to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific collocations and synonyms to avoid repetitive phrasing and to express your ideas with greater sophistication and accuracy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'There are certain species are black buck', which lacks a relative pronoun or correct verb structure, and 'Industries are disposing off smoke in the environment has added', which contains a subject-verb agreement error. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after periods and commas. While you attempt some complex ideas, the execution is often faulty. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and correct punctuation before attempting more complex structures. Proofreading your work for these fundamental errors is essential.
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