Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In the modern world, some people claim that the main environmental issue of our time is the loss of particular habitat such as plants, and animals. However, others assert that there are more crucial environmental difficulty. On the one hand, the prominent issue is that the saves the biodiversity. However, plants and animals are important play role in our life. Even any one single habit loss our food chain disturb. These are species meaningful impact our surrounding. Moreover, plants and animals habitat are essential. For example, a survey conduct shown wild life park are attract the international tourist make a financial benefit our country. Therefore, these species our important play role in environment.

On the other hand, some individuals assert that more important problems are remain. Firstly human problems should not be neglected rather than focusing plants and animals. However, other issues such as environment pollution is a big problems. Many people suffers these physical problems such as asthma, due to environment issues. Moreover, human being also disturb when occur these problems. To instance, a medical research newspaper revealed that 70% of physical problems due to pollution.

In conclusion, although plants and animals these environmental issue but some other problems can not be neglected. In my opinion, all problems rather than focusing one problems, balance is necessary when solve any difficulties. Human being remain important.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to address both views on whether the loss of species is the main environmental problem or if other issues are more crucial, and provides a concluding opinion. However, the task achievement is significantly undermined by two main factors. First, the text falls short of the required 250-word minimum, containing only 225 words, which incurs a penalty. Second, the development of ideas is limited and repetitive. For example, the arguments regarding biodiversity, the food chain, and pollution are stated rather than fully extended or supported with clear, logical elaboration. The phrase 'human problems should not be neglected' is vague, and the supporting examples lack depth. Consequently, the response achieves a Band 5.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into an introduction, body paragraphs addressing both views, and a conclusion, showing some basic organisation. However, the overall progression is hampered by disjointed sentences and unclear relationships between ideas. Cohesive devices are frequently misused, mechanical, or awkward. For instance, transitional phrases like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are attempted, but internal paragraph cohesion breaks down due to fractured grammar, such as 'However, plants and animals are important play role in our life.' Referencing is also confusing at times, making it difficult for the reader to follow the logical thread smoothly. Paragraphing is present, but internal unity is weak. This corresponds to a Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The student uses a limited and often repetitive vocabulary, with frequent errors in word choice, collocation, and word formation. Examples include 'loss of particular habitat such as plants, and animals' (incorrect pluralisation and category), 'important play role' (incorrect collocation for 'play an important role'), and 'environment pollution' instead of 'environmental pollution'. While there are attempts to use less common items like 'biodiversity' and 'financial benefit', inaccurate phrasing ('habitat loss our food chain disturb') noticeably strains the reader and restricts the lexical score to Band 4.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, and attempts at complex sentences are almost uniformly faulty. There are frequent, heavy grammatical errors throughout the text, such as missing verbs ('more important environmental difficulty'), incorrect verb forms ('a survey conduct shown'), and severe subject-verb agreement or clause-structure breakdowns ('To instance, a medical research newspaper revealed that 70% of physical problems due to pollution'). Punctuation is basic and often ineffective at clarifying meaning. Because errors are dense and frequently impede communication, the performance matches the Band 4.0 descriptors.

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