Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-22
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Nowadays, It is often argued that many individuals think that the major environmental issue of our time is the loss of certain organisms of plants and animals. Some people believe that this is positive, while others argue that it is negative, This essay will discuss the both views before giving my own opinion.
On the one hand, the main argument is that, the decline in species of plants and animals is a serious environmental problem. It has a negative impact on climate. Firstly, if we talk about animals, people are unnecessarily hunting them for their own needs like fashion and supplements. People take them for granted and treat them like monsters without any fear of God. On the other hand, plants are also plucking unnecessarily for making perfumes and detergents, whereas people know that alternatives are still available for these products. For example, a recent research revealed that, In Japan people used to hunt while jaguars. But now the natives of that country are dying to see that species again. But now they regret their old traditions. Therefore, It is understandable that why some people support this view.
On the other hand, others argue that it's not the main one. There are more some important evironmental problems like pollution, deforesting and traffic congestion. Due to rapid population we have been facing so many harmuful problems. Because overcrowding not only creates pollution or other environmental problems, but also makes things expensive for local people. For instance, government make some strict rules against these problems. Financial gain should not be the main focus of authorities, they should consider other factors as well. In my opinion, i completely agree with second view, because other factors are the main cause of environmental problems. Government should take a serious action against this.
In conclusion, although both views have their own advantages. I believe that considering other environmental issues are more important. Because it not only effects the individual but also the whole environment.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You address both views and state a clear preference for the view that other environmental problems are more important. The discussion of species loss includes hunting and the example of jaguars, while the second view mentions pollution, deforestation and traffic congestion. However, the response only partly develops the task: the reasons why these broader problems are more important are not clearly compared with species loss, and the link between population growth, expense and environmental damage needs explanation. The jaguar example is also difficult to follow and does not clearly support the claim about Japan. Develop each side with a precise cause-and-effect explanation and a relevant example, then make your comparison explicit.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views and a conclusion. Phrases such as “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help signal the discussion, and the reader can generally follow the overall direction. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The opening says “Some people believe that this is positive,” although the task asks which environmental problems are more important, not whether species loss is positive. Within the second body paragraph, the shift from population growth to government rules and financial gain is abrupt. The jaguar example also repeats “But now” and is hard to track. Use clearer links between claims and examples, and keep each paragraph focused on one line of reasoning.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “species,” “pollution,” “overcrowding,” “alternatives” and “financial gain,” which gives you a basic range for discussing environmental issues. There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “decline in species.” However, several inaccurate or awkward choices reduce precision: “plucking” is unsuitable for plants in this context, “deforesting” should refer to deforestation, and “harmuful” is misspelled. Phrases such as “more some important” and “dying to see that species again” are also unnatural or unclear. Aim to learn environmental collocations as complete phrases and check spelling and word forms; this will make your ideas easier to understand and more convincing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt a mixture of simple and complex structures, including conditional and cause-and-effect forms: “if we talk about animals” and “Because overcrowding not only creates…”. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some points difficult to follow. For example, “although both views have their own advantages” does not fit the intended meaning, and “considering other environmental issues are more important” has an unclear grammatical structure. There are also problems with articles, agreement and sentence boundaries, as in “government make some strict rules” and the comma splice in “Financial gain should not be the main focus of authorities, they should consider…”. Practise building accurate clauses and separating complete sentences with a full stop or suitable conjunction.
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