Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is observed that some people believe that fictional violance that showed on television is harmless entertainment.While other firmly believe that it has very negative impact on people.

In my point of view, it is true that fictional violance is not a good source of entertainment.It is creating more damage than we think.It is research proven that any form of violence,even if its fictional, has negative impact on human psychology.

First of all sort of TV shows/ films create aggression.It activates specific harmone.People feel more destructive by watching such programms.It effects their mental health very badly.

Secondly, some immature and innocent people try to adopt the same action in their real life.And definitely concequences would be negative when they try to do such violant proformance.

It also encourage fear and terror among people.Firstly people watch such stuff for fun but ended up with fear.

For example, when i was a child i watched some fictional TV programms with my siblings. Even after so many year sometimes i deamt of exact that horror violent scene.It had very negtive impact on my mind.

On the other hand some people believe that it is quite fine to watch such violant stuff.Because everyone knows that it is fictional.It has no reality at all. Even the children also sensible to differentiate between real and fictional. They believe it is just for entertainment.So they support their opinion.

But in my point of view fictional violance that portrayed on television should be banned. Or atleast it should be age specific. the government should take responsibility of it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and make your own position clear: you argue that fictional violence can be harmful and should be restricted or age-specific, while also explaining that some viewers see it as harmless because it is fictional. Your personal example about remembering a violent scene from childhood is relevant support. However, the two sides are not developed equally. The argument that viewers can distinguish fiction from reality is stated briefly, without explaining why this makes the content harmless or giving an example. Some claims on the harmful-effects side, such as violence activating a “specific hormone,” also need clearer explanation or support. Develop each view with a reason and a concrete example, and make the link between evidence and your opinion more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, several paragraphs presenting harms, a paragraph for the opposing view, and a concluding opinion. Sequencing phrases such as “First of all,” “Secondly,” and “On the other hand” help readers follow the main direction. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, and the progression within the argument is not always clear. For example, “It also encourage fear” introduces another effect, but “Firstly” then repeats a sequencing function rather than showing how the point relates to the previous ones. The opening sentence’s “While other…” is also left as a fragment, weakening the transition between views. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example directly to the point it supports; paragraphing the harms into a more unified argument would also improve flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “fictional,” “aggression,” “mental health,” “entertainment,” and “age specific.” However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, such as “violance,” “harmone,” “programms,” “concequences,” and “deamt.” Some combinations are also unnatural: “negative impact on human psychology” is understandable, but “violant proformance” does not express the intended idea naturally. Repeated use of “negative,” “people,” and “such stuff” makes the discussion less precise. Build a wider set of accurate expressions for effects and media content, and check spelling carefully. More precise collocations would help your ideas sound clearer and more academic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including a conditional idea in “when they try to do such…” and a contrast between the two views. Meaning is generally recoverable, but there are some errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and punctuation. For example, “While other firmly believe…” is an incomplete clause, and “It also encourage fear” has a subject–verb agreement error. In “It is creating more damage than we think,” the tense choice is awkward in context, while “Even after so many year sometimes…” has problems with plural marking and sentence order. Several sentences also run together without spaces after full stops. Practise complete clause structures, consistent agreement and tense, and accurate punctuation while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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