Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Entertaiment is a source which most people love to have.

when it comes to entertainment one school argues that fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment another school argues that fictional violence on television does more harm by encouraging violent behaviour.

Apart from few draw backs I agree to the people who think that fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertaiment.

There are two forms of violence they are good violence and bad violence. Good ficational violence portrayed on television is the best form of engaging people during a movie because most of the people like the movies which has action, triller and whenever there is a fight pr violence in the movies everyone one in there would pay more attention to the movies and watch it with more interest apart from the best form of entertaiment there are other advantages such as people would learn few fight skills from the movies or any other entertainment platforms to protect them self from danger.

when it comes to bad violence portraged on television such as killing people harming someone with weapouns may be a bad influence on people because it will encourage people who already have violent behaviour and when it comes to children or kids when they watch these kind of bad violent movies continuouly they may get influenced by these scence and they become violent in the future and these bad violence movies may also increase the crime rate.

Therefore all the fictional violence portrayed on television is harfull some may create good impact on the people and some may influence them in a bad way it all depends on how the people take it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views: the response presents fictional action as engaging and potentially useful for self-protection, then recognises that violent content may influence children and people already prone to aggression. Your position is stated early, but it is not fully consistent: you call fictional violence harmless, while the conclusion says that some forms have a bad influence and may increase crime. The distinction between “good” and “bad” violence is relevant, but the examples and reasons remain broad, and the opposing view is not explored in much depth. To strengthen the response, explain more precisely when fictional violence is harmless and why, and support each side with a specific example before giving a clear, qualified conclusion. (Eight words copied from the task prompt were not counted.)

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable sequence: an introduction, discussion of positive effects, discussion of possible harms, and a concluding statement. This gives the reader a basic sense of the argument. However, the two main discussion points are packed into long paragraphs, and the progression within them is sometimes difficult to follow. For example, the first body paragraph moves from audience interest to learning fighting skills without a clear link, while the final paragraph repeats the contrast rather than resolving it. Connectors such as “when it comes to” are repeated, and some transitions do not clearly show how ideas relate. Use separate, focused paragraphs for each view, with clear topic sentences and more precise linking and referencing.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “violent behaviour,” “crime rate,” “influence,” and “protect themselves from danger,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several expressions are repeated, especially “fictional violence,” “movies,” and “entertainment.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, such as “Entertaiment,” “ficational,” “portraged,” and “weapouns,” as well as awkward or imprecise combinations such as “good violence” and “bad violence.” These choices sometimes make the intended distinction less clear. Build a more accurate range of terms for screen content and its effects, and check spelling and collocations carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the argument without relying on repeated labels.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and use clauses to explain causes and consequences, for example when describing how children may be influenced by violent films. However, complex sentences are often difficult to control, and frequent errors affect clarity. The opening body sentence joins several ideas without clear sentence boundaries; “most of the people like the movies which has action” also has an agreement error, and “they protect them self” has a pronoun and number problem. Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including lowercase sentence openings and missing commas or full stops. Practise building shorter, accurate sentences first, then combine ideas with controlled clauses. Check subject–verb agreement, pronoun forms, articles, and sentence boundaries during revision.

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