Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There is a debate about wherthere the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment, while other thinks that it encourages violent behaviour. I strongly believe that fictional violence portrayed on television is not only for entertainment purpose.

On the one hand, the people who believes that watching voilencein moves or in television is just for entertainment purpose basically it is not correct. According to articls young generation learn things form moves and from T.V shows. But some of individuals watch these seions just for entertainment purpose not for voilence. For example, a year before a news was spreaded on social media that a person took a weapon and killed 5 persons in mosque just because he was inspired from a move that is why he took this step.

On the other hand, the people who believes that these things create negative impact they are correct.Moreover, I have observe that young generation make motivation to movie actors and do avery thing that they see in movie. For example, I also have observed my activies that I also do voilence like that I have seen in the movies or on social media. Recendly I have beaten to one of my friend with the moves that i have learned from social media and my friend gets so much injured from my moves.

In my perspective, a person should watch voilence move but just for entertainment purpose. However Young people should make insperation to good actor and learn valueable things not the voilence onces.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both views and give a personal position, especially through the examples about a person inspired by a film and your own imitation of movie violence. However, the discussion is uneven: the first view is introduced but not clearly explained, and the claim that some people watch only for entertainment is not developed with a reason or example. Your opinion also shifts: you say violence is “not only for entertainment purpose,” then advise people to watch violent films for entertainment. Clarify whether you believe such content can encourage behaviour and explain your position consistently. The response is 242 words, so it is 8 words below the 250-word minimum; the 9 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Use the extra space to develop both sides and your conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted by “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a concluding opinion. This helps the reader identify the two perspectives. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear. For example, the first body paragraph moves from a general claim about young people learning from media to a violent incident without explaining the connection, while “But some of individuals…” introduces a contrasting point that is not fully linked. Repeated references to “people who believes” and “for example” also make the organisation feel mechanical. Build each paragraph around one clear claim, then explain and illustrate it, using pronouns and linking phrases that make relationships between ideas explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “fictional violence,” “negative impact,” “inspired,” and “entertainment purpose,” so the main subject is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate or misspelled forms make the writing less clear, such as “voilence,” “moves,” “seions,” “insperation,” and “valueable.” Some combinations are also unnatural, including “make motivation to movie actors” and “do avery thing that they see in movie.” Aim for accurate topic vocabulary and natural collocations rather than repeating “violence” and “entertainment.” Proofread spelling carefully, and choose precise expressions such as “imitate characters” or “violent acts” to communicate your ideas more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “while” and a conditional-style recommendation beginning “However.” The meaning is usually recoverable, but errors occur frequently in sentence structure and basic grammar. Examples include “other thinks” and “people who believes,” where subject–verb agreement is incorrect, and “I have observe,” where the verb form is faulty. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention: “a person took a weapon and killed 5 persons in mosque” lacks an article, while “they are correct.Moreover” needs punctuation and spacing. Practise forming accurate subject–verb patterns, using past and present perfect forms consistently, and separating complete sentences. More reliable control of these structures will make your examples easier to follow.

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