Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recet years , there has been considerable debate regarding whether fictional violence is a harmless form of entertainment or not. While some people argue that portraying any kind of violence on television might has severe affects on a person's personality, others believe that it is safe and just for entertainment purposes. This essay will examine both perspectives before explaining why I believe that it can be harmful for some people.

Those who support the former view often argue that watching movies which have crime scenes in it can often normalize aggressive behaviors, especially in children. For instance, if we talk about children who watch action movies or cartoons are more likely to be aggressive. They aslo try to imitate risky stunts because they see their favourite characters doing so. It may also reduce empathy in them. It is mainly because the criminals are violent and lack empathy. Consequently, fictional violence is not entirely harmless.

On the other hand, opponents content that it is safe to watch action movies or series which involves violence. One compelling reason for this is that people, especially adults, understand it is imaginary and such no thing could be done in reality. Moreover, it is a form of entertainment and relieves stress. Additionally, adults can control the exposure by taking safe measures such as turning on kids mode. Although both arguments have merit, I am more convinced that there should be strict age criteria for who can watch such content. It should not be allowed for children particularly.

In conclusion, both perspectives present valid arguments. Nevertheless, I remain convinced that the access should be available for everyone, as it offers more sustainable and long-term benefits.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed all parts of the prompt by discussing both views and providing an opinion. However, your conclusion contradicts your body paragraphs. In the body, you argue that fictional violence can be harmful and suggest strict age criteria, but in the conclusion, you state that 'access should be available for everyone,' which confuses the reader regarding your actual stance. To improve, ensure your conclusion consistently reflects the position developed in the body. The ideas are relevant, but the development of the 'harmless' argument is slightly more superficial than the 'harmful' argument. Strengthening the link between your examples and your main arguments would help achieve a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. You use cohesive devices such as 'For instance,' 'Consequently,' and 'On the other hand' to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the logical flow is disrupted by the contradictory conclusion mentioned earlier. Referencing is generally clear, though some sentences, such as 'if we talk about children who watch action movies or cartoons are more likely to be aggressive,' are grammatically awkward, which slightly impacts the flow of ideas. Improving sentence structure will help your arguments connect more smoothly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'normalize,' 'aggressive behaviors,' 'compelling reason,' and 'sustainable.' There are some minor errors in word choice and form, such as 'might has severe affects' (should be 'might have severe effects') and 'opponents content' (should be 'contend'). While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, these occasional inaccuracies prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on mastering the difference between nouns and verbs (e.g., effect vs. affect) and ensure your word choices are precise in the context of the argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'In recet years' (spelling), 'might has severe affects' (verb form), and 'such no thing could be done' (awkward phrasing). Additionally, the sentence 'if we talk about children who watch action movies or cartoons are more likely to be aggressive' is a run-on/fragmented structure. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they are frequent enough to limit the score. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and basic spelling to improve your accuracy.

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