Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Most of public consider that the unreal intended harm which is conveyed through television channels is not detrimental to entertain the audience. On the other side, the perspective is opposite which provokes a sense of misbehaviour in individuals. Because these serials have influence on the community group which can become a source of change in perceptions. Therefore, I support the side which claims it is disadvantageous.
Firstly, in contemporary time, the public tilt is quite high towards movies in which encompasses fictional films also, if different age groups watch these serious killing scenes, a negative message or lack of peace can be done by these clips. This is because, the entertainer takes it serious and try to do similar to that, the significant reason is that this kind of actions are well aligned with their personalities and will design their future. For instance, on 12 May, 2024, Ali, an intelligent student in FARMA medical college in Rawalpindi initiated gorilla war, which is majorly affected by movie named as 'Justice'. That is the major reason which enables me to consider it not advantageous.
Secondly, many social group persons say that fictional series are a source of enjoyment and do not harm the society in order to maintain law and peace, The primary reason is that, in scenes proper environment is provided which intricate actors to perform their particular tasks with proper training, by considering it, in a real society all these factors are lacked which do not allow a citizen to perform such kind of criminal acts. Moreover, people do not consider these actions serious, if anyone commit crime then they do it deliberately. Due to these reasons, public advocate that it is not behind these moves.
To sum up, half of the society group is on one side which believe that entertainment by unreal characters and movies is not harmful to society. while other believe that, these movies provide a pathway to people to do these tasks. I firmly believe these could be the causes of such type of actions in society.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, including both views and a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The argument regarding the negative impact of violence is supported by a specific example, though the example itself is slightly unclear in its phrasing. The counter-argument is also presented, but the explanation of why some people find violence harmless is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with clear, logical reasoning rather than relying on general statements about 'social groups' or 'personalities'.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'To sum up', which help guide the reader. However, some of the transitions are slightly mechanical or awkward, such as 'by considering it' and 'in order to maintain law and peace'. Additionally, some sentences are disjointed, making the flow feel slightly unnatural at times. Improving the variety and precision of linking words would help the essay achieve a more sophisticated level of cohesion.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are frequent issues with word choice and collocation. For example, 'unreal intended harm' is an unnatural way to describe fictional violence, and 'public tilt' is not standard English. There are also instances where words are used incorrectly, such as 'intricate' used as a verb. While the student attempts to use a range of vocabulary, the lack of precision and occasional misuse of terms limits the score. Focusing on learning collocations and more natural phrasing will significantly improve this area.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'most of public consider'), incorrect article usage, and awkward sentence construction (e.g., 'the entertainer takes it serious and try to do similar to that'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma splices. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on sentence structure and proofreading for basic errors is essential.
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